h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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Where I work, there are many long corridors. When walking down these corridors, you frequently see someone walking towards you some distance away. They see you and there is a mutual nod or smile of recognition. But then what? You can't keep the smile going for the next 30 seconds it takes to pass each
other and it would appear rude to look away from them while walking towards them. And you can't talk to them because you're too far away and yet you should probably think of something to say when they get closer. What is the optimum distance at which to say "Good Morning" or "Hi there"? What if they clearly recognise you, but you have no idea who they are? What should you do? Is it acceptable to dodge into a side-corridor until they've passed?
professional masks
http://www.halfbake...rofessional_20masks
These would solve the problem. [egnor, May 26 2000, last modified Oct 05 2004]
Corridor Tactical Supply Center
http://www.nerfcenter.com/
Get your fight on with a Nerf gun. (click on "Purchase Nerf" to view the selection of semi and automatic nerf guns) [iuvare, May 26 2000, last modified Oct 21 2004]
[link]
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Stupid Idea #1: Put bright lights at the ends of corridors, to (a) make it hard to see people in the glare until they get close, (b) give people an excuse to avert their eyes, and (c) combat SAD! |
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Stupid Idea #2: Do the opposite: make the corridor almost totally dark, so that you can't make out features until people get close, and you have a chance to rest your eyes. Couches in the corridors would become favored nap spots... |
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Stupid Idea #3: Combine corridors and bathrooms. Line the walls with sinks, urinals, stalls, etc.. This saves space, and there's already well-established etiquette for avoiding eye contact in bathrooms. You'd need to double every corridor (M/F), though... |
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You could try walking backwards, but then you have the problem of having to look at people walking forward in your direction as well as walking into objects. If everyone walked backwards, you'd still have to look at people as they receded, but I think that would more of a reason not to engage them. They're leaving your viscinity, after all. |
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Other than that, all I can suggest is: run, don't walk, down hallways. |
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Carry something (book, magazine, piece of paper, PDA, Rubik's Cube) and pretend to be utterly fascinated with it, until the very last second as you pass the other person, and then say, "OH Hi!" and keep walking. |
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Potential Downsides: everyone in the office may come to think of you as totally immersed in your own little world. |
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I wear big wraparound sunglasses whenever I'm in sunlight due to my eyes being light sensitive <WHY do people build a perfectly good building then put holes in the roof?!> and generally just 'fail' to notice them until they're close. Without being able to see my eyes, most people just avoid contact. <Being demophobic, this is a plus.> |
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Belt fed rapid fire Nerf dart guns.Woohoo! |
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Why anyone outside of junior high school that has reached
an age greater than 13 should worry about this situation is beyond me. On the other hand the Nerf gun idea that
"StarChaser" had wold be great fun!!! |
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Didn't Addams (Dilbert) have a line in his book about carrying ice? People never ask why you're carrying ice, and they assume you're in a hurry since it's melting. |
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Douglas Adams in the Meaning of Liff defined this problem in terms of CORRIEDOO and CORRIEVORRIE : |
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The crucial moment of false recognition in a long passageway encouter. Though both people are perfectly well aware that the other is approaching, they must eventually pretend sudden recognition. They now look up with a glassy smile, as if having spotted each other for the firt time, (and are particulary delighted to have done so) shouting out 'Haaaaaallllloooo!' as if to say 'Good grief!! You!! Here!! Of all people! Will I never. Coo. Stap me vitals, etc.' |
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Corridor etiquette demans that one a corriedoo (q.v.) has been declared, corrievorrie must be employed. Both protagonists must now embellish their approach with an embarrassing combination of waving, grinning, making idiot faces, doing pirate impressions, and waggling the head from side to side while holding the other person's eyes as the smile drips off their face, until with great relief, they pass each other. |
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Here in Europe, playing around with your mobile phone, pretending to be writing an SMS, seems to be emerging as the accepted protocol. |
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Which is fine until you walk into the other person and drop your Nokia... |
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If you walk down the corridor doing something odd with your hand (waving them around in front of you or above your head or something) people will look at your hands and not your face..... |
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You can get flesh-coloured spectacles with Christopher Lee eyes on them. These terrify the corridor occupants into flight. Of course, you have to spend a few days practicing the walk (gait = vRs*2, stride = 2 metres). |
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StarChaser: none of the belt-fed nerfs I've seen come even close to the Gatling-style one I bought in 1999. Unfortunately, the air reservoir broke on that one, but it could fire off 20 darts full auto in about 3 seconds. |
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StarChaser, supercat, I just had to interject here, at the expense of being entirely off-topic... I once had a dart gun that had a 50-dart circular belt, a handle on the right side, a stock for resting against the hip, and a crank on the left side. This mutha could unload all 50 darts in about 8 seconds in a hail of orange plastic. As an added bonus or two, the gun was HUGE, the cranking was very tactile with a sort of pseudo-kickback, and the mechanism inside the gun was noisier than HELL, so the entire operation was completely daunting for anyone on the business end. Alas, some cheap plastic part inside snapped and it was rendered useless. |
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I want one! If you know where to find it, let me know. If you still have the other one, send it to me and I'll try and fix it... |
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That sounds like fun for parties:-) Super soakers are fun too. |
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Hmm? (Is this non-sequiter annotation day?) |
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No. Cave fish have 'light sensitive' things in the approximate position of eyes, but all they can do is detect that there is light. |
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I should have made that 'ultraviolet sensitive'. But still, it's dumb to be indoors and have to keep squinting because someone put skylights just far enough apart that your eyes adjust between them. |
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