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Chlorophyllms

Make your arm an algae farm
  (+17, -2)(+17, -2)
(+17, -2)
  [vote for,
against]

Sold in the standard squeezy containers, but in the chilled sections, this high sun-factor protection sunscreen is a little different from the usual.

In addition to the standard moisturisers, the emulsion contains growing nutrients and a colony of desmids, a single-celled, chlorophyll-containing algae that lives in low mineral waters.

When applied to the skin, Chlorophyllms offer the same sunscreen protection, but feel so much better because the gel is applied cold from the fridge.

As the sun warms your body, you can rest easy that your skin is safe from burning and that your Chlorophyllm sunscreen is busily producing valuable oxygen. As the hours progress, the protection gets better and better as the desmids grow and cover more of your skin.

When done, just wash off - it's just harmless algae.

jonthegeologist, Jun 07 2006

Desmids http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desmid
[jonthegeologist, Jun 07 2006]

Meteor Shit! http://humano.ya.co...kingincreepshow.jpg
The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill [thumbwax, Jun 12 2006]


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Annotation:







       In other words, you want stuff to grow on you?
neelandan, Jun 07 2006
  

       sure. Provides Oxygen, covers your skin and is easily washed off as the algae are in the gel.   

       Seems a shame to see those acres of flesh on a hot day without Chlorophyllms. Might as well put it to some use.
jonthegeologist, Jun 07 2006
  

       I'm not convinced that algae offer very good uv protection. Also not sure about the wisdom of producing oxygen near the skin when there's that much uv around - it might promote oxidation which is not the best.
hazel, Jun 07 2006
  

       spoilsport! I just wanted a green filmy skin!   

       Seriously. The chloroplasts in the desmids offer excellent UV protection since they absorb light in order to produce energy. If the gel also had a high SPF, then it'd work sweetly. (I'll add that edit in)   

       It won't produce so much oxygen as to cause health issues, but enough to make it worthwhile.
jonthegeologist, Jun 07 2006
  

       Do they absorb uv at the same frequency as that which damages DNA?
hazel, Jun 07 2006
  

       Sloths seem to cope well with coatings of unicellular algae. +
ConsulFlaminicus, Jun 07 2006
  

       Some sponges produce UV absorbing chemicals. The sponges could feed on the algae.
spidermother, Jun 07 2006
  

       Ch ch ch chia. Kidding +
Would this algae have an odor?
  

       // Would this algae have an odor //   

       Would it help?
jonthegeologist, Jun 07 2006
  

       // Would this algae have an odor //   

       Would it help?
jonthegeologist, Jun 07 2006
  

       what did hazel vote? I need to know.
po, Jun 07 2006
  

       // Your second posting of that comment, really drove home the point. // Worth posting twice I thought.   

       [hazel] tells me she's in favour of the idea, but only for it's name and the "make your arm, an algae farm" strap line.
jonthegeologist, Jun 07 2006
  

       I voted in favour - I do like the idea (with suitable amendments) as long as [jonthegeologist] doesn't choose to indulge.
hazel, Jun 07 2006
  

       yes, I can imagine..yuk!
po, Jun 07 2006
  

       //Would it help?//
It might.
  

       // Would this algae have an odor //   

       // Would it help? //   

       // It might //   

       In that case, I'm delighted to announce that Chlorophyllms come in a delightful range of perfumed gels, ranging from "Sunscreen", "Vanilla" to "Algae".
jonthegeologist, Jun 08 2006
  

       all over algae eh? Nice.
jonthegeologist, Jun 09 2006
  

       I didn't like it at first, but now it's growing on me. +
dbmag9, Jun 09 2006
  

       //I didn't like it at first, but now it's growing on me..// OMG! LOL!
MoreCowbell, Jun 09 2006
  

       Calm down, MoreCowbell. It wasn't that funny.
dbmag9, Jun 10 2006
  

       Green fingers ... and hands, arms and torso.
jonthegeologist, Jun 10 2006
  

       Dont like the idea of stuff growin on me! why not throw aload of compost on urself and grow grass altogether then feed it to some cows
conmanxx, Jun 10 2006
  

       post that idea - let's see what people think.
jonthegeologist, Jun 12 2006
  

       This springs to mind, The Creature From The (black)Halfbakery lagoon.
skinflaps, Jun 12 2006
  

       There is just ONE thing that this idea needs...
MoreCowbell, Jun 13 2006
  


 

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