h a l f b a k e r yExperiencing technical difficulties since 1999
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Chewing Spectacles are a pair of glasses that have their
eyepieces fashioned into two open mouths. These are
complete with detailed inflated lips to hold the lenses in
place and a set of upper and lower front teeth.
When someone is saying something, and you want to stop
the conversation in
its tracks, you switch your glasses
unto "chewing mouth" mode.
Doing this activates the miniature motors that power the
lips and teeth, which can assume a large range of
motions
based on careful and through analysis of mouth gestures,
generally connected to the process of eating. Each
mouth
lens is capable of either independent or coordinated
action. The ability to see through the glasses is only
partially obscured by this action.
Chewing Spectacles come in male or female mode. Male
mode can feature upper lip moustache hair of choice.
Female and
male lips can be botox enhanced, or made as replicas of
famous celebrities. The teeth can also be fully
customised
on demand, ranging from "Kardashion Ultra Bleach" to
"Hillbilly Rotted Stumps".
Chewing Spectacles come complete with a
programmable
hand held device to activate and control their use.
Makers not responsible for anything that happens during
their deployment.
[link]
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What, no prosthetic remote-controlled tongue to allow you to idly clean your glasses while someone's talking to you? |
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I had thought of a cleaning tongue, but there is no
real room for storing it unless it's a very linear
version. |
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Yes - a woodpecker, for example, has a long (10cm) thin tongue which it retracts and coils up behind its brain. There should be space for such a tongue in one of the arms of these glasses. |
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Glasses have brains, now ? Who knew, huh ? Must be what's meant by "smart eyewear" ... |
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Some humans chew the ends of the side-pieces of their spectacles. From the idea title, we thought this would be a design for replaceable flavoured attachments for side-pieces to protect them from damage, yet still provide the wearer with something to satisfy their oral cravings. |
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I can think of absolutely no alternative uses for a long prosthetic tongue. |
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I thought this was going to be a spare pair of glasses with
chewable earpieces. |
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I originally thought this would be a pair of glasses to
wear while chewing stuff, in the same way as
"reading glasses" are glasses to wear while reading -
"Lunchtime? - hang on, I'll just put on my chewing
spectacles". |
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My intention is to stop conversations. Flavoured
objects that you can casually chew on, like pens,
pencils, rulers glasses etc are all baked on this
site. (I have always assumed) |
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