h a l f b a k e r y"This may be bollocks, but it's lovely bollocks."
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Caps-Lock can be a real pain if it gets tuRNED ON BY MISTAKE AND A LINE OF TEXt is typed before the error is realised.
BorgSoft (A wholly owned subsidiary of BorgCo) are now able to offer a fix for the chronically overcapitalised.
For a very modest fee, users may download from the BorgSoft website*
a compact driver that adds a key click via the built-in PC speaker. When the Caps Lock key is on, the click is higher pitched. When SHIFT, CTRL, or ALT is pressed, again, a different tone.
These tones can be customised by the user in terms of frequency, duration, volume etc., or "effects" using WAV or MP3 clips can be used.
When the key with the funny wobbly battenburg-cake symbol is pressed, the app makes a rude farting noise, and a popup icon of a Penguin making an obscene gesture appears on the user's screen.
Versions are available for all real operating systems (Unix, Linux, VMS, Ultrix, HP-ux, Android, ChromeOS, Symbian) and consideration is being given to porting the functionality onto various low-end gaming platforms i.e. Windoze.
*BorgSoft collect and store personal information only for the purposes of billing, product support, and adding your biological and technological distinctiveness to our own. We will not give or sell your personal details, location, or genetic material to any other Aggressive Hegemonising Swarm without your prior permission. Please read the terms and conditions very carefully before clicking "YES, I ACCEPT " as you will will be consenting to a legally binding contract to use the provided software under licence, and also to be assimilated into the Collective at the first possible opportunity. Freedom is irrelevant, self determination is irrelevant. You do not have 14 days to change your mind. You must comply. Resistance Is Futile.
No capslock keyboard layouts
http://www.taniwha.org.uk/
For the assimilation resiters [pocmloc, Apr 16 2012]
CAPS LOCK warning on XP
http://www.xp-tips....s-lock-warning.html
[Ling, Apr 16 2012]
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Annotation:
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//before the error is realised//
s/realized/recognized/ If the caps lock were turned
off before the error was realized, there would be no
problem. This is a clever ruse to increase the
proportion grammar pedants in the collective, isn't
it? You obviously haven't got enough of us at
present. |
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And we'd have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for you pesky kids ... |
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<waits for [mp] to spring grammar trap> |
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Well, it's not like you're using it for anything useful, is it ? C'mon, realize the value of that idle asset while you have the chance ! Make your soul work for YOU ! Use it or lose it ! |
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[+] for the Borg license... and the idea of giving keys their own individual sounds. The actual idea... well, personally I only screw up on capslock when a cat has decided to help. |
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Oh, dear.
s/proportion grammar pedants/proportion of grammar pedants/ |
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[mouseposture] was probably trying to type while keeping a majority of attention on the door, and a firm grip on a futility knife... |
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It's well known that any online comment criticizing
someone else's grammer must contain at least one
grammatical error. s/.../..../ |
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Two with one trap ... excellent ! |
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There is a way to get the CAPS LOCK key to make either of
two different tones according to on or off status, at least
on the crappy machine I'm using at work. But the
subsequent typing is 'non-clicky soundy'. |
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I like clicky keyboards for some reason, the first was -If I
remember correctly- an X terminal back in the early 80s. |
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P.S. I've already downloaded a cracked version of BorgXoft
KeyKlikZ so stick the license up your collective posteriors. |
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//cracked version of BorgXoft KeyKlikZ// is that the one where the virus has been removed ? |
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I assume you don't "touch type", [8th]? |
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On MacOS, Apple decide whether you should have Caps Lock on or not, so this functionality will not be needed. |
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I like this idea. I touch-type quite well, but when I'm
writing fiction (as is most often the case) I sometimes close
my eyes and may not open them for several hundred
words; accidental Caps Lock would be minorly disastrous at
such a time. Not that this happens to me often--once was
enough for me to pry the key off of my keybord. Why the
fuck do they put it _there_, for Genghis' sake? |
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Some (mostly older) keyboards have the control key where the caps lock key usually is; and apparently some newer ones (e.g. the OLPC) are abandoning the caps lock key altogether. |
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After all, the original reason for the old shift lock key was because it was a physical strain to hold down the shift key on mechanical typewriters with the little finger (according to Wikipedia). Also, I guess, it was much harder to depress the mechanical version without realising it, because it needed to be pressed quite hard, and there was a physical sensation as it latched into place (a feature that was implemented on some early computer keyboards). |
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(After some digging) Aha! I thought so. I've got a Sun keyboard with the control key to the left of the ASD... row, and a very small caps lock key at the left end of the bottom row (beneath the shift key), and quite a stretch from the home position. In other words, the positions of the keys are swapped compared to most modern keyboards. A very sensible arrangement. |
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I'm a little surprised that [8th] didn't specify a sound
similar to that made by the arming mechanism on an
anti-personnel mine, when the Caps lock key is
depressed. |
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That would send a chill through quite a few people
whom I know. |
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