h a l f b a k e r yOn the one hand, true. On the other hand, bollocks.
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Most of you should be familiar with pottery. You sit at your mud-splattered table, you throw some moistened clay on a spinning wheel, you lean into it and make yourself... a pot!
Pretty exciting, huh? No? Well what if I add some spice to this slighty senile adventure? Presenting: Ceiling-Fan Pottery!
For
this exciting new hobby you will need an ordinary ceiling fan (you might need to reinforce it depending on your weight), some duck tape and nails, a pottery table, an empty bucket, and your normal pottery needs.
You now get a friend to set up the table under the fan. Then reinforce the fan as necessary. Place the empty bucket just to the side of your table. Now, do a hand-stand on the table while your friend tapes your feet securely to opposite blades of a ceiling fan. Once you have made sure you are secure, get your friend to throw down a peice of moist clay on the wheel.
Now flick the switch and around, and around you go! You may find it slighty more difficult to shape the clay when your rotating at such alarming rates, but don't give up! Keep your elbows locked and your eyes on the target. If you feel the need to throw up, aim for the empty bucket. Ten points for Gryffindor if you make it!
Once you have made your masterpiece, or if your starting to see spots, have your friend stop the fan and get you down. Once you have thrown up and recovered, take a look at your art work. How is it? If it looks anything like a pot, your in luck!
You now have a piece of art that is really worth cherishing. Bravo my friend!
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I like your style Jiimmhh. This is such a funny idea, though it took me a second to grasp your meaning. |
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//Ten points to Gryffindor//
I love it! |
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Second post, and going strong! |
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You're doing a fantastic job here, [Jiimmhh]. |
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One quick note, though: the "Other: [general]" category is usually an indication that you haven't looked for a correct category. Might I suggest "Sport: Air" or "Culture: Art: Interactive"? |
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Might be easier to attach a pottery
wheel to your ceiling. Pottery
wheels (we have one) have an
impressive amount of torque -
whether going dead slow or at high
speed it's pretty well impossible to
stop one with your hand - unlike a
ceiling fan which can easily be
stopped with your hand (or head, if
you're UnaBubba).
I think
there are possibilities to doing
pottery on a ceiling-mounted
pottery wheel. The clay sticks to
the wheel pretty well, so it's
unlikely to fall off, and you'd take
advantage of gravity in making
your pot taller. |
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How about pottery while strapped into one of those universal gimbal rides, where you're spinning around all three axes? I suspect that you would get either spherical pots, or wondrous spiral creations. |
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Good one Jiimmhh. Just remember the rules ”k after c except in duct tape” and “e before i except before c” (piece). |
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The time it takes to fire your creation in the kiln also doubles as your dizziness recovery time. Welcome to the bakery, Jim. (WTAGIPBAN) |
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And for those of us with more prehensile plates o' meat, just dangle from your hands and let those talented trotters get sculpting.+ |
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Ooh, I'm dizzy just thinking about it! This is delicious new baked goodness. Thank you, Jimmhhhhhh! + |
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//Once you have thrown up and recovered, take a look at your art work.// |
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Thats the method I use! ... have a bun to put in your new jar! [+] |
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Well done [jiimmhh] +. I've never made pottery, but [hippo's] version sounds like a great spin-off from this idea. That is, gravity working to help make tall things. |
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I agree that in theory [Hippo]'s idea sounds good. But I have done some works in ceramics, and I can tell you that if you put a wheel on your ceiling and tried to make a pot, you would find yourself a good deal muddier and no more closer to making one. |
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First of all, it takes a good deal of muscle to get the clay centered and this pushing would be hard if you had to do it upwards. It would be like holding a pot above your head for a long time. Second, the raising, or in this case falling, of a ball of clay into a pot requires pulling it up, in this case pulling it down, and though there is a certain amount of sticking it is not enough to keep the clay on the wheel. |
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excellent idea! you don't even need a pottery table, do you? just a regular table will do since you will be providing the spinning motion. I suppose that using a spinning wheel could add to it though |
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Excellent Idea (+) Following on from your theme, how about merry-go-round-collaborative-pottery wheels (US read carousel for merry-go-round). You could have some kids all sitting on the mgr, facing inward, where a lump of clay would be found on a stationary potting table. As they all rotate around it they extend their hands (inwards) and shape a collaborative pot? For both your idea and this variation, one advantage is that the pot isn’t rotating and hence there is no centrifugal force acting on the pot walls causing them to splay outwards. |
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How do you get the clay out of your hair when you fall? Great idea!^^ [+] |
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Otherwise, this is too good to pass up :) |
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Let me know how it goes...... |
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