h a l f b a k e r yEureka! Keeping naked people off the streets since 1999.
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I just left my car lights on and ran the battery flat. I then got my hand burnt using a set of puny jump-leads that practically melted trying to convey enough power from my helpful neighbour's car....grrrrrrrr. My own much stronger leads were safely coiled up in my workshop (of course).
I know that
there are all sorts of smart systems to stop this, but I want something different. What I want is a large rubber ceiling spider that is kept in place by a solenoid/magnet arrangement.
Should you switch off the engine, without first turning off the lights, the spider is suddenly released and descends in front of your face on the end of a strand of thin catgut, making it impossible to ignore. (flashing multiple led eyes optional)
This kind
http://members.iine...pider_Dads_hand.JPG
would be hard to ignore. [pertinax, Jun 18 2009]
[link]
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I don't care what most cars have... most cars are as boring as pringle jumpers. I want this! |
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boy takes girl out on first date
boy pulls over in a dark secluded spot
boy leans in for the big one
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Girl screams bloody murder when rubber spider gets
caught in her hair bob. |
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boy doesn't get any dates anymore. :-( |
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[boy doesn't get any dates anymore...] |
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Boy doesn't need date to push car for jumpstart. |
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//Girl screams bloody murder when rubber spider gets caught in her hair// Alternative ending.... Girl is a secret Arachnologist, and screams with delight as she correctly identifies the spider as a replica Tegenaria Duellica. Girl falls madly in love with boy. Girl marries boy, and they start a spider breeding farm where they live happily ever after. |
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Mr. and Mrs. Spiderman. A screenplay might be in
order. How sweet. |
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Oh yeah, and let's build a fort. One that's big enough
for two. Bells ringing in the background would add to
the ambiance. |
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Mount a robotic spider under the car. If you leave the lights on and walk away, the spider scuttles after you, yelling, "Hey ! HEY ! You left the lights on ! YOU LEFT THE LIGHTS ON AGAIN ! HOW MANY TIMES ? " The spider follows the transponder in your keyfob. |
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When you turn the lights off, the spider climbs backm into its nest until the next time. |
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Now, would you try to steal a car that has a large, intelligent, talking spider living underneath it ? We think not. |
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Yes, bliss, yes! Just like that! |
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I like 8th's iteration. The spider might sometimes follow you to bed, muttering disconsolately about other habits it finds displeasing, or the state of things in general. |
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I actually keep a large rubber spider on the passenger side of the dashboard. If have to turn on my main beams during daylight hours, I usually place the spider on the passenger seat as a sort of physical aide-mémoire. |
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Since I neglected to do this on Sunday, I clearly need the more elaborate version I have proposed. As for it following one around.... isn't that a bit daft? |
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//muttering disconsolately about other habits it finds displeasing, or the state of things in general.// |
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"And I never did understand why you needed that turn signal frog." |
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//squeaky hammer included for road-rage// |
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I'm actually tempted by that. |
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A chicken to strut around clucking sarcastically when you wimp out instead of overtaking coming up to that blind corner. |
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Ya had to bring up the chicken didn't you. |
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My mother-in-law once met a huntsman spider on her rear-view mirror. Being on a mirror, it appeared at first glance to be twice its actual size. And she hadn't even left her indicator on. Clearly, that one hadn't been trained properly. |
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"spiders on mirror are smaller than they appear" |
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{looks around nervously for our gracious hostess disapproving of excessive phatic posting}
Oh yes, and congratulations [lbaf]! |
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