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Camel Care
Big tobacco taking care of its customers. | |
Tobacco companies have been flooding the market with 'earned items' via UPC (no offense to plumbers)/label/catalog collections. Smoke more, get more stuff. Have you ever looked at the crap they give away? Is it geared towards smokers? "I just smoked my fifth pack of Camel NF's today...let's go mountain
biking." Why can't I use my 'Marlboro Miles' to purchase the parts of my iron lung? How about that Camel tracheotomy tube...surgery prepaid. Only 10,000 'Camel Bucks'. What a deal! "Will your chemotherapy be billed to your insurance, sir?" "No, I have 'Carlton Coverage' for that."
Sure, the obvious answer is to quit smoking, but, if I don't, why not give me something I can use down the road.
[link]
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Rant / consumer advice. No idea. |
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Too short for a real rant, although "crap" and a question mark that close together usually means trouble. No real advice directed toward the end-user. Nope. You're free to go, sir. |
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I think it's a satirical idea, not a rant. |
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Emblazoned with Joe Camel Logo of course. How about if you want a Joe Camel Headstone? Another Mill? |
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Who want's an oxygen mask modeled after Joe Camel's
enormous phallic mug? |
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[SC] I'm a smoker...non rant. |
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I've compiled some other items that are smoking essentials that should be added to the list (these are the cheap items): |
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The car upholstry patch kit. |
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The drunk safety lighter. Keeps the tipsy from lighting themselves instead of their smoke. |
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Deodorizer specifically made to remove that brand's smell. |
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Child safety attachment. Keeps kids from running into the lit end.Expensive: In home nursing from pretty ad girls/guys. |
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Expensive: In home nursing from pretty ad girls/guys. |
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Dental cleanings and care. |
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Fire insurance for sleepy smokers. |
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