h a l f b a k e r y"Not baked goods, Professor; baked bads!" -- The Tick
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It's just a buttplug, with a shape optimized for comfort
and unobtrusiveness,
with a hole running through the middle,
covered at the inward-pointing end by a gas-permeable
membrane so it doesn't permit egress of non-gases. This
results in fart gases leaving the body as soon as they
reach the
rectum, rather than building up and having to be
released in
bursts. This should result in no noises and no noticeable
odor,
because it will be so dilute.
Prior art discussion:
[1] is in the shape of a tube, rather than a buttplug. I
believe my invention has the advantages of being a
buttplug, which people like to wear (some people,
anyway, and the rest probably won't mind trying one if it
denecessitates farting), and of being smaller, which will
be easier to conceal. [1] also has the elements of
storage or processing of fart gas, while mine simply
releases it into the atmosphere. I think that processing
for
odor will is unnecessary with the dilution resulting from
continuous release, and processing for energy extraction
will not be worth the effort for the small amount of
energy it contains. [1] also mentions the possibility of a
miniaturized version that could be worn to bed. My
invention is already that small.
[2] is very similar to my invention, but does not have the
optimized buttplug shape, being simply a tube with a
flange. It also implies the necessity of neutralizing or
masking the odor, which, again, I think is not necessary.
As well, it is designed and marketed as a disposable
product, whereas mine is durable and should last quite a
while before wearing out.
[3] is a device for holding the buttcheeks apart rather
than the anus open. My device should do that to a great
enough extent with its flared base, which, being
designed for long-term wearer comfort, holds the
buttcheeks
slightly apartenough to keep them from sealing and
keep itself from slipping inside, while avoiding the
discomfort of a wide object in the buttcrack.
31/170
Well then.
[1]
Fart Catheter Prior art, discussed above [notexactly, Feb 26 2017]
[2]
Bum tube Prior art, discussed above [notexactly, Feb 26 2017]
[3]
Fart Silencer Prior art, discussed above [notexactly, Feb 26 2017]
[link]
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There is no way we are going to google for prior art on this. No way whatsoever. |
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Farts don't build up at the rectum over hours, but seconds. Nevertheless this device should work as long as you're healthy and eating your fiber, |
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"This should result in no noises and no noticeable odor, because it will be so dilute" |
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MFD, bad science. Actually, no science, butt who's counting? |
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[+] Useful for butt plug enthusiasts who can't fart while so engaged. Having to take that thing out every time you have to let one go is a pain in the ass. |
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We find it very disturbing that you appear to have precise,
indeed intimate, personal knowledge of the issues involved, [tat]
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