h a l f b a k e r yIf ever there was a time we needed a bowlologist, it's now.
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This is based on the laughable assumption
that both parties in a hypothetical
relationship can be rational about a
breakup. To help smooth the break, the
party that initiated the breakup must
assist their ex in finding a new partner by
way of being their wingman at the local
watering hole,
arranging dates, and
otherwise acting as their agent. If it
becomes clear that the dumpee, if you
will, is dithering for the purpose of
clinging to the dumper, the dumper may
cease wingman activities. This could be
determined by agreeing upon a set
amount of time to find a replacement at
the onset of the breakup, say 2-3 months.
Results/preferences may vary.
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This would be most interesting if a bus load of sport's mascots arrived at your intended watering hole. |
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"I think that beaver looks quite nice" |
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"How about that cock, I mean rooster..." |
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Sort of like Amazon.com: "People who went out with me might also like ______, ________, or ______" |
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I tried convincing the last girlfriend I had to do this, but she wouldn't. Bitch. [+] |
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Laughs at [phundog]'s anno. |
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I was introduced to she who was to become my wife by an ex-girlfriend. |
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Lovely condition, only 10 000 miles on the clock, one careful lady owner; sudden emigration forces sale. |
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This would mean going out on more and better dates than when you were together, presumably to places that serve alcohol. Sounds like a trap to me. |
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Might I suggest a mandatory cooling period of at least a month before trying this? Assuming this is one of those breakups where you stay friends at all, rather than filing mutual restraining orders. |
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"Funny I don't recall her ever having mentioned you. How long have you known my ex-wife, Sybil?" |
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The temptation to pick out the biggest loser in the bar (other than myself) for my ex would just be too much for me to handle. My duties should just be limited to wingman and agent, forget arranging dates, I could only have way to much fun with that task. |
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<oblgatory UB refference> Careful with that ex Eugene. <oUBr> |
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I'm sort of surprised at how well this
was received. Clearly it wouldn't work
for everybody, hence disclaimers in the
post. |
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I've been wondering how one would
bring this up, and at what time. If you
brought it up when being dumped,
you'd likely get no help. If you brought
it up when dumping, well, good for you
but you get nothing out of it. So it has
to be proposed while the relationship is
still intact. Difficult. As far as ex as
wingman goes, I'm told it's easier to get
with somebody if someone of their own
sex approaches them for you,
particularly if your wingman is a lady.
Obviously this so-called principle
doesn't apply in same-sex
relationships, but a wingman is always
useful. |
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