Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Apply directly to forehead.

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Bouncer Baton

 Doormans Nightstick
  (+2, -1)
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A metal detector, torch, UV light and Handcuffs all in one handy Baton shaped package. This would be a great help when doing my door work, and enable me to get rid of the bulky items I have to carry around. It should be about 20cm long (8”inches) and about 4cm square (1 Œ inches). The metal detector would vibrate rather than beep. The UV light is ideal for showing up the white powdery stuff and the handcuffs would be of the quick fastening tape variety, which shoot out of the ends of the stick. Also if the poop hits the fan it would make a handy club!
—S-note, Jul 12 2007

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       The handcuffs dont need to be metal, I was thinking more like plastic banding with thin steel strips in. They would only be used to detain an individual until the police actaully turn up. And yes, its easier to get a down swing going if the Torch is already up there!
—S-note, Jul 12 2007
   

       zipties work just fine as handcuffs and are easy to store in a baton shaped device.   

       But you better not use them in the US, unless you want to be arrested for false imprisonment.
—Galbinus_Caeli, Jul 12 2007
   

       I'm surprised at that, however in the uk you can use cuffs if you have attended the correct courses and hold the relevant certifactes. Of course its not illegal to own them.....
—S-note, Jul 12 2007
   

       From my days in security you could tell people to leave, but you could not make them stay. Unless you were a real cop.
—Galbinus_Caeli, Jul 12 2007
   

       As long as only reasonble force is used, you can make them stay!
—S-note, Jul 12 2007
   

       Reasonable force being defined as asking "Pretty please" sotto voce, while avoiding a hostile body posture?
—Galbinus_Caeli, Jul 12 2007
   


 

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