h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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A bluetooth earpiece with a tiny extendable rotary brush which, when commanded by the paired handset, gently extends into the auditory canal and rotates, relieving itching in a discreet and effective manner.
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I had an uncle who had lots of hair growing out of his ears. I know for sure that a family of beetles lived in both of his ears since when ever he tried to hear, he couldn’t and would say huh? His wife, my aunt would try to trim the ear hairs but she couldn’t get very far into the ears until she saw an ad in a comic book for a nose-hair cutter. Sure enough, she got it and was able to trim his ear-hair down to the roots. The beetle family either left or died and my uncle could hear again. |
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Alas, my aunt didn't have much to say of interest, so eventually my uncle let his ear-hair grow back and I think the beetles returned, but I'm not sure. |
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Cool. Now how about some Bluetooth underwear for those other itches that need " discreet " attention. |
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I see what you're doing, Borg. Today it's a small robot earpiece, tomorrow we're all assimilated. |
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Damn you, [wagster] ! We'd have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you pesky kids ! |
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<Imagines entire borg horde being
dragged away by police whilst shaking its
collective fists at [wags]> |
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//Imagines entire borg horde //
sp (horde): Aggressive Hegemonising Swarm |
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I have this horrible thought that the brush of one of these pieces gets stuck, mired if you will, in the trench of ear wax and the rest of the device ends up spinning instead..! |
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