h a l f b a k e r yAlmost as great as sliced bread.
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Beer soaked popcorn
We have only two hands, so how can be drink beer and eat popcorn at the same time | |
Give Keleigh and his coffee cereal credit for reminding me of this.
The problem: At ball games etc. people like to drink and eat while being squeezed into narrow aisles. If you want to eat the popcorn you either have to put the beer down at the risk of someone stepping into it, or you have to twist
your neck to an odd angle to pour the popcorn down your throat, which can do serious harm to your breathing and may also lead to spilled beer. On the other hand if you want to safely open a new can of beer you have to put down the popcorn, which poses similar risks as putting the beer down.
The solution: Spongy, water proof popcorn (or popcorn like substance) that is soaked in beer. Then it is coat with a sealant (beer flavored caramel?) so it is dry to the touch. Now you only need one hand to hold the bag and one to pop the kernels in your mouth.
Each kernel gives you a refreshing squirt of beer when you bite down on it. The crushing of the kernel also releases an enzyme that makes the whole thing digestible and water soluble. (Don't want to have all floaters in the septic system for the next weeks.)
Orbitz soda
http://joelavin.com/orbitz.html
like this, but it'd be beer with popcorn floating [oxen crossing, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
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Annotation:
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You're wasting valuable beer space with all that popcorn. |
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[simonji] No yuk or other bovines involved, no animals at all. This is purely vegetarian. However, I heard that mares milk ferments nicely into something alcoholic. Feel free to try. |
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Salty butter-flavoured beer...
(runs and pukes) |
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Not enough beer, too much popcorn. Better to have
beer with neutrally buoyant beer proof popcorn floating
throughout, like the ill fated orbitz soda (with the
booger-like globs floating everywhere). + for the
one-handed convenience. |
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An easier solution: Hold the popcorn container between your thighs, hold the beer in one hand, and eat popcorn with the other. Works until you suddenly stand up to cheer your team! |
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Mine does too [UnaBubba], and never on the polished floorboards, always on the goddamn carpet. |
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Didn't the Aussies achieve about the same taste with that horrible Vegemite stuff? Not that I ever tested it, living in a safe distance in Austria, I just heard it. Anyway, here, take my fishbone and hurry, I think there it comes again...
[runs off to toilet and puke shis guts out] |
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Didn't the Aussies achieve about the same taste with that horrible Vegemite stuff? Not that I ever tested it, living in a safe distance in Austria, I just heard it. Anyway, here, take my fishbone and hurry, I think there it comes again...
[runs off to toilet and pukes his guts out] |
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Should perhaps be moved to
product: sealant |
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Just be a man and bring a flask of vodka and a pocketful
of beef jerky. |
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