Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Auto Body Experience

Grind fenders and pour...oh, you know where this is going.
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My wife's car was hit from behind at an intersection this week - she's just fine, but the car is a testimony to modern crumple zone tech.

It drives just fine, but it's terrible to look at. They'll probably total it.

If only there was a shell available that could just press on over the whole mess, like an oversize faux rear end that was all just external cosmetics for the trunk, lights, paint.

It would be a modular add-on crumple zone - no trunk access, functional lighting. The "big booty" appearance would not conceal that the vehicle had been hit, but would reduce the evident chaos at the rear.

Easy to install, adheres with an interference fit and some adhesive. Activate the adhesive, apply it as far as it will go, and back (gently) into something flat and solid to seat it before the adhesive sets to get full coverage. It could be generic as to compact, mid- and full-size to reduce cost.

normzone, Feb 26 2014

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       Your insurance costs would skyrocket because the crumple zone is one of the key safety features and you're now doing without it.
swimswim, Feb 26 2014
  

       Buy a Land Rover. Crumple zones are something that happens to other people.
8th of 7, Feb 26 2014
  

       Seeing emergent themes here combining vehicles and faux rear ends and your wife.
rcarty, Feb 26 2014
  

       You have a point there, [rcarty]. [swimswim], you do also, and I don't imagine it would accomplish all that the series of stock c-zones did even if it was internally accordioned to provide some shock absorption.
normzone, Feb 26 2014
  

       I can see it now:   

       The All New 2015 Honda Accordian!
With origami folding crumple zones designed to slowly reform after impact as the shock absorbers re-set!
  

       //2015 Honda Accordian //   

       Is it easy to tune ? How does it compare against, for example, the Ford Tempo ?   

       Is it spacious inside, or is it a bit of a squeeze ?   

       Are there many key features to note ?   

       And it should be manufactured by BMW, shirley ?
8th of 7, Feb 26 2014
  

       ~the winds of lane change~   

       The focus group said it was a bit of a drag for the first little while, but that it was a breeze to drive for the rest of the time.   

       //Buy a Unimog. Crumple zones are something that happens to other people.//   

       Fixed that for you.   

       This idea? -1 for "form over function". Not safe, adds weight, no trunk access.
DIYMatt, Feb 26 2014
  

       In a perfectly rigid body, you become the crumple zone. Energy must go somewhere.
RayfordSteele, Feb 27 2014
  

       //In a perfectly rigid body, you become the crumple zone. //   

       Best to purchase your vehicle from Acme, then; particularly if you're a coyote... what it must be to live in a world with over-unity coefficients of restitution...   

       // Energy must go somewhere //   

       Have a look down behind the sofa cushions, there's all sorts of stuff down there.
8th of 7, Feb 27 2014
  
      
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