h a l f b a k e r yClearly this is a metaphor for something.
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There are thousands of unwanted pets abandoned each year that have to be put to sleep.
Why not make heroes of them and give purpose to their meaningless deaths by dropping them with little paracutes over some of the old minefields around the world that need to be cleaned up to allow re-use of the
land.
The little darlings would then run around setting off the mines. Sure they will die, but because of their size they would almost certainly be killed instantly, and they were going to die anyway. At least this way the will die for a good cause.
Just think of the amount of human suffering that would be prevented.
By the way I'm not sure if this is a real idea or a joke. Gimme a couple of days to think about it.
Unexploded Cow
http://www.cheapass...Product_Code=CAG032
Game in which you try to make money by taking mad cows from England and using them to clear bombs in France [wiml]
For [UnaB]
http://groups.yahoo...blmedia/message/337
'There have been reports from several areas that livestock were driven across fields as a low-tech method of clearing mines. Sheep were reportedly used during the Iran-Iraq war and in Bosnia; pigs in El Salvador; and cattle in Zimbabwe.' [wiml, Oct 11 2001, last modified Oct 21 2004]
For [UnaB]
http://groups.yahoo...blmedia/message/337
'There have been reports from several areas that livestock were driven across fields as a low-tech method of clearing mines. Sheep were reportedly used during the Iran-Iraq war and in Bosnia; pigs in El Salvador; and cattle in Zimbabwe.' [angel, Oct 11 2001, last modified Oct 05 2004]
Minesweeping Dolphins
http://www.applesfo...th/doldutwart4.html
Rarely abandoned as pets, and smart/expensive enough to be trained to mark mines and swim away -- but those are pluses in my book. [n-pearson, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
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Annotation:
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Semi-Half-baked. Such a project was suggested in a letter to the Cambodia Daily newspaper back in 1996. The writer suggested that the millions of English cattle which might have mad cow disease be shipped to Cambodia, where whilst roaming, they might detonate the millions of mines buried in that country. |
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This particular suggestion, however, earns a fish, as most domestic pets are not of sufficient weight to trigger anti-personnel mines. |
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CasaLoco - Why not just use all the bones that this idea is getting (now and in the future) and drop them from a plane.. I assure you the force of the impact would set a land mine off.
Also, what wausqueke said. |
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Thinking back on the scene in "Saving Private Ryan", where the several enemy were set free by the US soldiers that overran them; those were told to "just go" in the direction they were pointed. If this was an accepted practice in mined territory, I say give it a go. But not with dogs, just enemy soldiers. Oh, and give 'em all a barrel of oil to roll … makes a nice gesture of humanitarian intent. |
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How does a Taliban change his lightbulb?
With his human shield. |
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<obligatory "please spay or neuter your pet" post> |
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I heard somewhere that during their fiasco in Afghanistan the Russians tried to train dogs with explosives strapped to them to run underneath tanks. Unfortunately, the dogs were trained on Russian tanks, so when they were set loose that's where they went. Oops. |
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Anyway, surely 'Troll Mine Clearance' would be a better idea? |
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Guncrazy's right, any domestic animal would be too small to trip a mine unless it was a seriously overweight dog. In that case, the animal probably has owners that love it so much they feed it til it gets that big. They wouldn't abandon it to be put to sleep. The Mad Cow idea has possibilities though. |
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A problem with using mad cows is that a) they have all been culled in the UK with continual testing looking for any aberant cases and b) they are treated like toxic waste and so causing them to be splattered all over countries recovering from war would be a faux pas. |
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Aside from smaller pets not being heavy enough and Oh no, how could you be so cruuuuel?, I don't see a problem. Oh yeh, it's baked isn't it. |
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Half-baked already by Viz (for BSE & Foot & Mouth livestock). |
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How about we build a big kevlar or titanium (for lightness) sphere, walls about a foot thick, and 10 feet diameter and put a person inside like one of those balls in Gladiators. They could run around inside like a hamster, rolling back and forth over a minefield, every so often being thrown a few feet in the air. If we pad the inside of the ball, it could be fun. |
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Woo hoo! Where do I sign up? |
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Ah! Curse you, wiml! You've posted my link. |
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Forget all that, all I have to ask is "Why doesn't the Taliban have to deal with Africanized bees while we do?" |
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Guy Fox: the Russians tried dog-carried bombs during the German fiasco in Russia in the early 1940's, not in Afganistan. They didn't work very well, as you say. I can't find any straight historical links, though judging by Google's output when queried for "russian tank dog mine", the treatment of exploding canines is a hot topic among the miniature wargaming community ("A Dog Stand represents one dog, has a Movement Rate of 5, and a Defensive Modifier of -6..." in 'Mein Panzer'). In fairness to the Russians it was one of those "you've-got-to-try-it-once" ideas. |
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I stand corrected, SkinnyRob. Still think it was poetic justice, though. |
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The major problem I see with using cows to destroy landmines is that an most AP mines will not kill a cow. Instead you'll have a whole mess of 3-legged bleeding cows laying around to clean up as well as landmines. |
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Vegetable mine clearance. Plant minefields with a fast-growing plant bearing heavy fruit or branches. Maybe pumpkins or bamboo. Ammonium nitrate is both an explosive and a fertilizer; I think other explosives contain significant amounts of nitrogen, so this might almost work. |
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Except that the nitrogen in the mines is pretty well contained...if it wasn't waterproof it wouldn't be much use, and if it's waterproof, the plants won't be able to get into it. |
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In actual fact animals are already used/have been used to clear mine fields, but they're sheep normally not cows. Don't ask me why, all I can say is that if the practice becomes widespread New Zealand and Wales could become rich. |
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Moggy In A Minefield. Yes, I have a recurring image of something like this. You fly over a large, dangerous minefield with a moggy. Put the moggy in a jumpsuit with parachute and then chuck thecat out the door and into history... don't know what inspired this. |
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Other games include; Moggy In A Meltdown and Moggy In A MineShaft. |
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