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Alcoholic Beverage Toothpaste

Boozepaste
 
(+2, -2)
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I admit that I may be among a very small minority, but one flavor I absolutely cannot stand is mint. I find the smell revolting and the taste even more so. It is therefore with great chagrin that I am forced to brush my teeth each day using some sort of mint flavored toothpaste, as there really is no other kind (even the ones that purport to be non-minty still smell and taste like mint to me—I think it's something in the chemicals used). It occurs to me though that if there's one thing capable of overpowering a minty taste and smell, it's liquor. So why not put actual liquor in the toothpaste? It's an antiseptic anyway, so it can't do much harm to your teeth, and it'd be much more pleasant than boring ol' mint (even if you're not as mint-averse as I am).

You could even have different flavors depending on your mood and preferences. Saturday morning might see you heading south of the border with Tijuana Tequila flavor, whereas Wednesday might be your night to relax with a nice brushfull of Highland Scotch or Kentucky Bourbon (although the latter would probably end up a bit like a Mint Julep, to be honest—as much as I wish it were possible to eliminate of any trace of it, mint is as tenacious a flavor as there ever was).

ytk, Aug 24 2012

http://www.mcphee.c...con-Toothpaste.html [hippo, Aug 24 2012]

http://www.bourbonb...ourbon-tooth-paste/ [hippo, Aug 24 2012]

http://www.halfbake...ser/dijontoothpaste [tatterdemalion, Aug 25 2012]

[link]






       //non-minty still smell and taste like mint//

Are you sure that it's the mint and not the fluoride that you find unpalateable?
DrBob, Aug 24 2012
  

       There are lots of non-minty toothpastes though - e.g. see links.
hippo, Aug 24 2012
  

       Maybe getting slightly drunk before bed can be part of regular hygiene .
rcarty, Aug 24 2012
  

       I would [m-f-d] for * flavour *- but if you took it out of the title we could have alcoholic toothpaste...for getting pulled over by the police! There wouldn't be enough alcohol to be detected by a breathalyzer test, but enough to smell it.
xandram, Aug 24 2012
  

       Do you also dislike caraway?
prufrax, Aug 24 2012
  

       I sorta do this. I mostly use bicarb for brushing, sometimes followed by a bit of rum as a mouthwash.
spidermother, Aug 25 2012
  

       Add cheese flavoured toothpaste, hold your own wine and cheese parties at home to avoid drink-driving charges and get sparkling white teeth into the bargain.
Phrontistery, Aug 25 2012
  

       //I would [m-f-d] for * flavour *//   

       Fair 'nuff, but I did change the title because what I'm proposing isn't really adding an alcohol flavor to the toothpaste, but actually adding alcoholic beverage to the toothpaste (in part for purposes of flavor, but also at least nominally as an antibacterial agent). I think this distinction may /just/ allow it to squeak through the guidelines, but I wouldn't argue much either if the consensus is that this is just a stupid idea for a ridiculous new flavor of an existing product.
ytk, Aug 25 2012
  

       Alcoholics sometimes have their mouthwash confiscated, but take away their toothpaste -- that's just cruel.
4and20, Aug 25 2012
  

       I bought a toothpaste in Spain which turned out to be orange flavoured. This sounds appealing, but is really quite astonishingly unpleasant.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 25 2012
  

       Ah, but think how much richer in experience you now are for having tried it. Not many people can say they've done what you have, [Max]. Truly, the few piasters you parted with in the exchange have bought you a degree of wealth immeasurably higher than their mere face value.
ytk, Aug 25 2012
  

       True. And I have the satisfaction of having bailed out the Spanish economy.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 25 2012
  

       I dislike the smell of alcohol on a person's breath, so a slightly drunken - from me.
blissmiss, Aug 25 2012
  
      
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