Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Adopt a tank

Feel like you are a part of the war!
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I was reading about the war cards and wondered, as I often have, what piece of war equipment my taxes were purchasing. I propose that for those who mark a special box, they can be notified exactly what piece of equipment their tax dollars have gone to support. Equipment supporters would be grouped geographically. For example: one Patriot Missile costs about $300,000. All of the folks in my suburb would thus be pooled to support a missile. We would receive a picture of the missile for the mantel, along with a little history of that missile (where built, weight, height, age etc), testimonials from the missile handlers, and so on. The missile would be given a name chosen by us - maybe "BoomBoom" or "Schrappy-Doo". The missile might be decorated with decals etc representing our neighborhood. We would receive updates on its status. Sometimes the update would be "CLASSIFIED" - how exciting! When it finally blew up, we could have a party. We would then be given a new piece of equipment to support - perhaps a fighting vehicle or maybe a plane.

Possibly the adoption system could be such as to break down the item so that there would be a piece all my own. I pay a lot of tax, so maybe I would get a gyroscope. Others might get the nose cone, a stabilizer fin, or maybe just several rivets.

We would all be rooting for our piece of ordnance and thus feel more a part of the war effort. Also, we would get a better idea of what exactly the price of these things are.

bungston, Jan 30 2003

War Cards http://www.halfbake...repaid_20war_20card
Many bones! [bungston, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Presentation Spitfires http://www.spitfire...n.co.uk/present.htm
Not exactly from Russia... [lurch, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 06 2004]

Adopt-a-Tank http://www.aaftankm...om/Adopt_a_Tank.htm
Program at a military museum. [waugsqueke, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 06 2004]

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       Now thats amusing to the point that i now have a stupid grin,[bungston] do you have land blocks on the moon yet ? (+)
skinflaps, Jan 30 2003
  

       Together, the US contingent of the 'bakery can finance a hammer.
thumbwax, Jan 30 2003
  

       I would like this more if I liked war more, or considered the apparently upcoming war to be justified. But it's pretty good anyway.
snarfyguy, Jan 30 2003
  

       I do like this idea, however, in all likeliness we would be adopting factory-made mashed potatoes or collared greens, or a private's paycheck.
Paine, Jan 30 2003
  

       I don't want to feel like I'm part of the war. Hopefully we won't be. Sorry but (-)
madradish, Jan 30 2003
  

       With my luck, my neighborhoods' taxes would pay for the administration fees and paper cost of sending out all of the notices.   

       This could be a cunning scheme to placate everyone with an illusion of choice. Hawks could "direct" their money into ordnance and feel well satisfied, doves and doubters could assign theirs to catering, supply, or reconstruction. You'd spend exactly the same amounts on exactly the same things, but the adoption scheme would let people believe, if they chose, that _their_ tax dollars emphatically were/were not going towards bombs and bullets. Could be generalized to almost any controversial endeavour.
Monkfish, Jan 30 2003
  

       Hmmm, when your item reaches the end of its life and gets decomissioned, would you get a first option at buying it ? I would vote for that. Oh yes, sir, I would definitely vote for that. And I have a big workshop, and a garage too, and I promise I won't do too much deliberate damage .......   

       Time to run for the shelter, [bungston], my B-52 full of croissants is heading YOUR way .....
8th of 7, Jan 31 2003
  

       So why on earth would I want to adopt a tank???   

       "Now come on Tonka, drink up your petrol, only another couple of tons to go..." It's bad enough just getting my son to eat his Weetabix, - and what happens when we have to choose a war for him/her to go to. They don't do war league tables, you know. Not yet at least...   

       It's all very well for you over-grown schoolboys to come up with these ideas, but where's the forward planning? It's always the women who end up having to do that in the end.
LittleMissLoopy, Jan 31 2003
  

       // So why on earth would I want to adopt a tank??? //   

       It's a bloke thing. You wouldn't understand.   

       And in my (admittedly limited) experience of driving tracked armoured vehicles, the one problem you are definitely NOT going to encounter is getting it to drink its fuel all up.
8th of 7, Jan 31 2003
  

       // It's a bloke thing. You wouldn't understand. //   

       Just a tad sexist and dismissive, 8th. This bloke doesn't understand it either. Fishbone - I'd prefer to support peace.
waugsqueke, Jan 31 2003
  

       8th of 7, that's the trouble with the kids these days. They either refuse everything that's put in front of them, or they eat you out of house and home, and then you get a few little horrors who manage to do both at the same time! I mean adopting a tank would treble my housekeeping budget straight away, and think what a mess he'd make of the garden.   

       Adopting a land mine is no better, - all they do is sit around all day doing nothing but getting under your feet, and then when someone trips over them they just BLOW UP at you!   

       Kids! I don't know, - why do we have them?
LittleMissLoopy, Jan 31 2003
  

       Wasn't this baked during WWII? I seem to recall seeing film of happy Soviet workers posing cheerfully with their adopted tank and tank crew. Or did I just imagine it?

<suddenly spots lurch's link> Yes, that too.
DrBob, Jan 31 2003
  

       // why do we have them? //   

       As mere cannon fodder, to have their lives squandered uselessly by our arrogant political leaders ? Afetr all, that's how it's always worked in the past.   

       // a tad sexist and dismissive// [waugs] I should have put quotes round that. It's a common quip in the UK.
8th of 7, Jan 31 2003
  

       //And in my (admittedly limited) experience of driving tracked armoured vehicles, the one problem you are definitely NOT going to encounter is getting it to drink its fuel all up.//
I think Little Miss was thinking about the input, not the consumption. My trusty little hatchback simply will not take all the 40 gallons I pay for every time. And tanks are bound to be a bit more fire-y. Wouldn't want to argue with one of those.
PeterSilly, Jan 31 2003
  

       8th, yes the quotes would have made it much less sexist and dismissive. Common thing, really? The English ladies must have some corresponding phrase, then, one hopes.
waugsqueke, Jan 31 2003
  

       "It's a girl thing. You wouldn't understand"   

       (although they actually do expect you to understand, thus causing the bloke to fall into a cunningly crafted no-win trap).
8th of 7, Jan 31 2003
  

       <bitter> It's called "marriage", [bliss]. </bitter>
8th of 7, Jan 31 2003
  

       I think the Monkfish modification to this idea should garner croissants from all. I propose that the blissmiss tax bucks go to support a carton or two of those leaflets dropped from planes that encourage folks not to fight. Or perhaps the Hershey bars given to the starving kidlets in the war zone.
bungston, Jan 31 2003
  

       It occurred to me that this might be fairly depressing for some taxpayer to receive notices that all of his tax money is still going to pay for the paint on a patriot missile that blew up in 1991.
bungston, Mar 24 2003
  

       Baked in the old days. A good idea though.
Madcat, Mar 26 2003
  


 

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