A Grey Damp Day In Scunthorpe

To escape the winter chills and perpetual rain, sunbeds are very popular in the UK. Not only do those attending these beds get a tan, but there is the added benefit of lounging around (for a short time) in a warm place decorated with fake palm trees and badly painted murals of perfect sandy beaches. (the skin cancer comes later)

Not every UK citizen lives in the UK. There are literally millions of UK ex pats living in every country throughout the entire world. Many of these countries are hot sunny places for most of the year. In some, the heat and cloudless skies are totally relentless, magnified by the constant presence of a baking overhead sun.

Believe it or not, many miss the experience of a dull, grey day with a watery sun barely able to penetrate the drifting drizzle. Where I live this is often referred to as “a grand soft day”.

A Grey Damp Day In Scunthorpe can satisfy this longing for a short time spent with the rain on your face; your feet soaked through as your shoes “let in”, and the pages of the notebook you forgot was in your back pocket washed of all its details. (personal experience)

Visitors to one of the shared rooms or private booths at A Grey Damp Day In Scunthorpe will find a choice of inclement weather experiences they can fine tune to suit their individual needs. Included in the experience is the “stormy gusts” room, where even a sturdy umbrella will be blown inside-out, and a passing car will drench the participants with mucky water from a roadside flood as they wait at a pretend bus stop. Then there is the gentle but persistent drizzle cubicle that freezes you to the core in the murky grey mist.

Familiar words and phrases may be revived amongst the other attendees about the weather, that bastion of all conversation starters in the UK. I simply cannot imagine anyone in California remarking on the dreadful shade of blue that characterises the perfect skies day after day.

On emerging, blinking in the sun, visitors can then enjoy watching the water evaporating from their clothes as they set forth, their cravings for experiencing A Grey Damp Day In Scunthorpe satisfied until the next visit.

Note also other booths under development include:
Time Spent With Swarms Of Gnats In The Fetid Mangrove;
Squashed Like A Sardine In A Noisy Subway Car That Stinks Of B.O. And The Air Conditioning Isn't Working