h a l f b a k e r ycarpe demi
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Following on from bs0u0155's idea.
As everyone knows, the UK temperature barely hits
double-figures in peak summer. So, why not just
dispense with the 10 degrees and up bit?
Huzzah, a savings in materials, or more space for the
"Rainy, more rainy, even more rainy, quick - get building
an ark" o-meter.
Mock up
https://drive.googl...NMm4dooMxQn1a6nZNp2
[not_morrison_rm, Nov 28 2018]
Mock up ver 2
https://drive.googl...cyrO8vYbPH2U1Ah1WSL
Hmm, looks kind of French [not_morrison_rm, Nov 29 2018]
Haggis explained
http://www.montypyt.../scripts/haggis.php
[pertinax, Nov 30 2018]
[link]
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It must be calibrated in Fahrenheit too. + |
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This is an excellent idea. Personally, I would suggest it be
marked in Degrees Newton, where 0°N is the freezing point of
water, and 10°N is about 30°C. Hence, most English weather
will be between 0 and 10°N, which seems logical. |
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I think you'll find that 10°N is defined as "The perfect drinking temperature for a cup of tea". |
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Incidentally, [nrm], are you quite sure you want a _British_
thermometer? Do we really want to have share it with the
Welsh, the Irish and the Scots? It strikes me that an English
thermometer is what's called for. |
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In fact, on reflection, can we not have regional
thermometers, to recompense us for the loss of local times?
Cambridge could always be 0.2°N ahead of London, for
example. |
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With the weather service needlessly bent on trivial
exactitude this makes welcome sense. [+] |
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// an English thermometer ... can we not have regional thermometers // |
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The Newton has already been spoken for. However, for Western regions the Brunel could be a suitable unit for a combined measure of wind and rain, and for the North-East, the Stephenson would be used to indicate the level of desolation and bleakness. |
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For the London area, we propose the Tindale as the S.I. combined unit of air pollution, urban noise, and generalized hostility to strangers. |
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The scale shouldn't be anything like as vulgar as to use
numbers and units. It should be calibrated in phrases. No
one needs to tell the population of England what "A bit
warm, too warm really" means. At the bottom end of the
scale is "Biting, best out of it" and "It's bitter out there". |
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Furthermore, the instrument cannot simply measure
temperature,
English weather phrases encompass so much more. The
instrument must be able to measure the temperature,
and the temperature record over the last week or so for
several locations that might be of interest to the
observer. It should measure humidity (believed to be
some sort of hot damp) cloudiness, rainfall, size of
raindrops, the angle of rain, how expected the rain was,
washing line status, wind speed, wind direction, wind
blusteriness (still no units for that) and so on. |
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When all this information is sensed, calibrated and
integrated it can be output as a single "fine" (+wan smile)
so that everyone understands perfectly, provided they
have long experience of the local climate. |
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I like the idea of a sophisticated weather station measuring rainfall, wet bulb/dry bulb temperatures, wind speed, air pressure, etc., and through a sophisticated piece of data analysis, summarising any combination of these data elements with the word "fine", except that this word contains slightly too much optimism. May I suggest more appropriate phrases would be "Could be worse" or "Mustn't grumble"? |
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8th, we're clearly on the same wavelength here. Perhaps
most important is that widespread and monomaniacal
dissemination of raw thermometric data is abandoned. |
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Should the weather forecast place a "12" over my region,
does that mean I'm in for a sunny autumnal day comfortable
in long sleeves and sunglasses ambling up some Lakeland
fell, or am I knee deep in peat, battling 70mph driving rain
and dying of exposure? Much better would be: "pffffff, nasty
up on them 'ills" |
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One mockup. Link . Due to not having any surplus
numbers, less materials are used and being compact,
more can be shipped in the same size box. |
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I note with some sadness that the indicator liquid in your
mock-up is red. I trust that the production model will have
red, white and blue? |
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// I am minded of Great Uncle Bulgaria at this moment // |
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Not just at this moment; you seem to be channeling the spirit of Great Uncle B. most of the time, now. It's quite disturbing. |
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If you find yourself experiencing an overwhelming compulsion to go and live in a burrow on Wimbledon common, you should seek help. Wombles Anonymous would be the obvious organization to contact. |
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[Ian] Hurrah - employment! The commute must be a pain though |
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Yes, but at least he doesn't have to pay anything to travel on the railway; " Underground, overground, wombling free ... " |
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Would the Stratford-Willesden Junction-Shepherd's Bush-West Brompton overground be any quicker? - you'd then be able to switch to the Wimbledon branch of the District Line. |
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[Ian], how did this disaster of "employment" happen? Did you
finally land that job writing jingles for the Sky Sign Language
channel? |
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//I trust that the production model will have red,
white and blue? |
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Hmm, see mock up ver 2. Red, white and blue...but
maybe not exactly what you were after... Link |
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//the Wimbledon branch of the District line// somehow
sounds like a clandestine secret order. |
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That description of the journey makes it sound like living in a warm, cosy burrow on the common with a gang of good-natured furry scavengers is actually a better option than risking life and limb in the dubious care of TfL ... |
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What is this tube thing you speak of? What is a train?
Is it something like a car? Being American, I'm not
aware of this technology. |
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It's exactly like the San Francisco cable-car system, but without cables, and underground
(//No, that overground from Stratford round the north to Clapham is about an hour journey from end to end, whereas the overground from Canada Water to Clapham is about 45mins// - yes, that's true; I thought you might save time on the rest of the journey though - changing trains at Clapham is a pain while at West Brompton it's pretty quick and easy, and I didn't think the West Brompton to Wimbledon journey was too slow, but then I haven't done it for a while so may be wrong) |
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// Being American, I'm not aware of this technology
// |
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I too struggle with these odd references to tubes and
tea, West Ham (a foodstuff?), "'ills", Welsh
(dishonesty?) and previous ideas about "haggis", which
sounds like a culinary weapon. |
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Haggis, at least, can be explained. See link. |
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// exactly like the San Francisco cable-car system // |
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Very true. Slow, antiquated, uncomfortable, unbelievably expensive, and packed with foreigners. |
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// Haggis, at least, can be explained. // |
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Haggis can be described (in between bouts of projctile vomiting), but can not be explained; the reason for its creation and existance, other than as a biological weapon, is not obvious. |
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I have to disagree with [8th] here, and probably poke him
with a pointy stick. Haggis is a dish created in the same spirit
as "burnt crunchy bits" (of which I know [8th] is partial) - i.e.
it contains all the scraggly and unattractive parts of the
animal that are, in fact, delicious. |
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(starts to take bets 8th vs Buchanan arm wrestling,
prize fund runs to 25p and Curlywurly(still in date)) |
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Place yer bets gennelmen... |
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Make sure you get his stake money off him in advance. |
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Actually I already owe [8th] £30,000. So just collect the
£27,462 directly from him, and he can write me a cheque for
the other £2548. |
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Ok, sounds fair ... oh, wait ... |
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Until the end of the bout, all pointy sticks are to be placed in the rack
provided, just under the helpful sign to remind you of the correct
spelling of "existence". |
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You'll take our pointy sticks away when you pry them from our cold, dead fingers ... |
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Bah ... blame the spellchecker. |
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Looking out the window, I should have gone for the
Ark-O-Meter... |
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An obvius incentive to local manufacturing, this cannot be imported from China, or any place with temperatures outside the scale. |
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