h a l f b a k e r y"Bun is such a sad word, is it not?" -- Watt, "Waiting for Godot"
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I was watching a movie clip on Youtube featuring soldiers in the Pacific getting shelled by ships. And I thought that if I were there, I would like to get out there and make those ships quit shooting! For one, because I figure once in the water the shells will be flying over me, not landing on me.
But also commando lone wolf valor! And black body paint.
I figure sinking the ships won't be too tough: I have flat magnet-fitted 5-packs of dynamite, very long waterproof fuses and a neat thing that you can click even if underwater and the fuse will light (suggestions on how this thing might work are welcome. 8th?) I will just swim along well below the waterline attaching these things.
But those boats are a long way out, and while personally very buoyant I have not been to the gym, ever. What does 1942 have as regards personal watercraft?
I propose one could first fit a motorbike with snorkels, like I have seen on some Australian cars. I understand these allow the car to ford deep streams etc without flooding the engine with water.
Next: I will remove the rear wheel and attach a propeller. Or possibly fit slats onto the wheel and convert it into some sort of ceiling fan looking propeller. Though that seems a little Gilligan's Island.
Last: I will put a piece of wood over the front wheel spokes, allowing me to use it as a rudder.
This vehicle will travel perpendicular to the normal direction of motorcyle which means the headlight will not be of much use. Probably it should stay off anyway.
Almost forgot: pontoons. One on each side. That way it will float.
I will leave the pontoon bike a safe ways out and then swim to attach the dynamite. Then take the bike to the next ship. Repeat until war finished.
Naval bombardment scene
https://www.youtube...watch?v=zhPc0m7oa2I [bungston, Feb 16 2017]
Hello Kitty water wings, Kettenkrad, for the lifting of
https://images-na.s...ZZT2xL._SL1100_.jpg [not_morrison_rm, Feb 17 2017]
BMW R75
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BMW_R75 Typical example [8th of 7, Feb 17 2017]
[link]
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When you get within rifle range of the sailors on the enemy
ship, you could be in for a greater degree trouble, than
that offered by the ship's larger guns. |
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not just rifle ... 40 mm AA guns pointed at your little contraption wouldn't be fun either. |
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By starting in 1942 I can pre-empt Kawasaki and use the name. They will have to fall back on the name "Wedgefinger" for their vehicle. |
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Re 40mm AA guns: you have forgotten about the black body paint. Understand that there will be no pale parts left unpainted. I will be invisible except for the whites of my eyes and I will squint. |
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Possibly not inaudible but the big guns are loud and they will all be pretty deaf on board. |
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Post the link to the movie clip so that we can carry out
some informed research, though this is a very dubious idea. |
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// suggestions on how this thing might work are welcome. 8th? // |
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Just garden-variety pencil detonators - Baked and WKTE. |
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As to the idea ... well, what with the probability of a Corsair making you a special free offer of .50 cal bullets, and the plethora of rifle-calibre medium MGs for close-in air defence, and the patrolling destroyers, the chances of you getting in close enough even to start swimming seem pretty remote ... |
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Oh, and there are sharks ... |
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The established very low success rate of small, expendable vessels against large armoured and armed vessels - kaiten, and suicide motor boats - does not encourage further research. |
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I like the pencil detonators. Thank you for the link 8th. It is neat that lead wire is used for two different types of controlled failure: by acid and by tension. I would have struggled to give one use of lead wire except maybe as a sinker. |
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Kettenkrad with water-wings on each section of track. |
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The track mudguards would need to trimmed away a bit. |
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Admittedly with a combat weight of 1560 kg, it'd need at least 1,175.27 of the Hello Kitty Deluxe Inflatable Arm Bands Floatation Sleeves (Ages 3-6) (Link), but that's 587.63 happy children swimmers after 'the decisive battle'. |
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Given the "bathtub" shape of motorcycle sidecars of that era, one on each side of a standard bike would probably give enough buoyancy. |
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