backpack +
antenna/aerial & motor +
modified umbrella ribs & covering +
obligatory gyroscopics +
remote =
umbrellavator

Backpack-like housing contains the aforementioned items - the gyroscope keeps the umbrellavator at an even keel if she stoops to conquer.
The umbrella has a greater surface area of coverage/protection at the forward reaches than the rear, as this compensates for the positioning of the backpack at the rear, as opposed to the hand-held variety.

disclaimer: A typical automobile's automatic antenna/aerial motor weighs far less than a hydraulically operated convertible top, and has greater portability, otherwise I'd have gone the convertible route for pure funkiness.
-- thumbwax, Nov 15 2002

Maybe you could also supply an add-on pack, to allow the spokes to automatically detect and poke out pedestrians eyes, to save the user the hassle.
-- CheeseFilteredCigarette, Nov 15 2002


Ah. I was hoping this was another way to get to my floor at work, Mary Poppins style.
-- DrCurry, Nov 15 2002


[thumbwax], since you have motors already involved , would you consider adding signaling and receiving devices, very tiny of course, for some of the umbrella tips. Information processed would coordinate the fluid dynamics of "umbrellowed" pedestrians, so that on crowded sidewalks easterly moving umbrellas would lower 2" and westerly moving umbrellas would rise automatically. Likewise umbrellas could coordinate to which side they would tip slightly if necessary. Or something like that. You know, Like aircraft collision procedures.
-- hollajam, Nov 15 2002



random, halfbakery