You phone your brewery and they deliver a rather large barrel-like thing with some cylinders and other equipment attached.

You pay them a deposit on the equipment, and for the contents; just-ready-to-ferment beer of your choice.

You pay no duty as part of this as there is no alcohol in it, yet.

A couple of days later, preferably when you're going to have a party, a cheesy melody plays from the equipment. Gas pressure builds and the integral beer tap becomes connected.

Party proceeds; draught beer for all. 288 pints to the barrel.

Once it's empty, or after three weeks; the brewery comes to pick up the barrel and either exchanges it for a new one with fresh ready-to-ferment beer in it, or returns your deposit and goes on their way.

Benefits:
You get cheap, fresh beer.
You get lots and lots of cheap beer.
Your beer drinking does not contribute so much in tax.

Some more details:
Equipment is basically a fermentation tank. It has gas pressurisation for use in dispensing beer and a tap. It will need a mains connection. It has a small heating element in case of use during winter to help fermentation along. Gas cooling can be used as beer is drawn to ensure cold beer for those who like it.

Category note: This is indeed a health : alcohol abuse issue; 288 pints of cheap beer... think about it. How else can it end?
-- vincevincevince, Oct 24 2007

Self Brewing Beer Can Self_20Brewing_20Beer_20Can
This is an improvement upon the linked idea; particularly in terms of increasing beer quality by bringing brewering and public house equipment to the home [vincevincevince, Oct 24 2007]

Bring the Gym bring_20the_20gym
I renamed this idea after 'bring the gym' because the concepts are very similar. [vincevincevince, Oct 24 2007]

It will need a bit of engineering thought, since you need to remove the crud that collects at the bottom of the barrel after the primary fermentation, but I don't see why it couldn't be done.
-- Srimech, Oct 24 2007


//crud//
Upon a recent brewery tour, I was informed that barrels which are not disturbed after brewing settle well and produce a better tasting beer than those in which lees are removed and the beer sanitised. Only caveat is that the beer doesn't keep as long... (I don't think that's a problem in this idea)

Apparently, good brewers ship their product before it is finished fermenting just to allow for in-situ settling and optimum freshness (also why beer tastes best from local breweries)
-- vincevincevince, Oct 24 2007


In my experience of small breweries and home brewing, you don't do the first fermentation in a barrel at all, you do it in a big vat. Then you draw it off into a barrel (or bottles) for the second fermentation. The second fermentation produces some lees, but nothing like as much as the first one. I think removing the lees at the end of the second stage might be optional, but not after the first one. I could be wrong.
-- Srimech, Oct 24 2007


Srimech, I'll listen to you on that. Let's just let the first fermentation settle a bit, then use a wee motor to close a device akin to a Venetian blind which is a couple of inches up from the bottom of the barrel/tank and was formerly in an open position.

However: please evaluate the overall idea as opposed to getting bogged down in technical details.
-- vincevincevince, Oct 24 2007


Oh, I did bun it before my first comment. Just making some engineering chatter really.
-- Srimech, Oct 24 2007



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