Sport: Soccer: International
World first XI   (0)  [vote for, against]
Just in case...

We are always on the lookout for extra terrestrials...

Imagine one day we find them...

Imagine we get friendly...

Imagine they like a game of football...

Problem?

We don't have a world team to represent us at the highest possible level.

Why not get the best eleven players (plus substitutes) to have a quick practice once a month just in case we do get challenged.

This could be applyed to other sports like... er... ok i can't think of any other decent team sports...

Even if they never play a competitive match, it would be nice to see the world elite train and play friendlies.

Whilst we are on the subject... Can we get the category

Public: Sport: Soccer changed to Public: Sport: Football

Its our sport, so we should get to pick the name.
-- MikeOliver, May 09 2003

Wasn't this essentially the plot of... http://www.spacejam.com/jam.htm
Different continent, different sport, maybe, but same princicple. [DrCurry, Oct 05 2004]

Sheffield FC http://behindthefla...effieldfc/id23.html
Oldest football club in the world [sufc, Oct 05 2004]

// Whilst we are on the subject... Can we get the category

Public: Sport: Soccer changed to Public: Sport: Football//

as I understand it, the rationale behind this is that this site is written, hosted and maintained in the US, so the category names might as well be US English.
-- hippo, May 09 2003


I never saw space jam... Was it about aliens and football? If so i gotta see it...

Forget the playing against aliens bit... I just wanna see the best taking the piss out of the rest (a bit like Real v Man U).

Isn't the site catered to appeal to a world wide audience? If so, it is little details such as this that should be kept in order...

Not really a big point, but still gets on my nerves. We have the decency to call grand prix by the french name, so why can't the yanks do likewise?
-- MikeOliver, May 09 2003


Heck, I liked this until I realized MO was referring to soccer!

In reality, aliens will probably insist that we play their games. Complicated alien games weighted down with a billion years of rulemaking. Games that will probably have very little interest for humans... unless there's nudity involved.
-- pluterday, May 09 2003


The fairest way to do it would be to play one of their games and one of our games. Or it is possible that aliens will be just like us, and enjoy football too (hell, they will probably even get the name right).
-- MikeOliver, May 09 2003


What if they have powerful tentacles, and enjoy Greco-Roman wrestling? they would beat us silly.
-- friendlyfire, May 09 2003


Yeah, but we'd 'ave 'em at hide and seek...
-- MikeOliver, May 09 2003


is it possible that the more cultured and intellectual the community, the bloody sillier the games they play?
-- po, May 09 2003


That's the rules po.
-- MikeOliver, May 09 2003


If that is the case, "Cricket" makes the British more cultured and intellectual than anyone else.
-- ato_de, May 09 2003


I agree on both counts... (although baseball must come a close second).
-- MikeOliver, May 09 2003


auto_de: Cricket was purposely taught widely across the British Empire by the British to "civilise" people. It remains one of the world's most popular sports and in some places it has acheived cult status.

People from around the world still write books about the cultural value of cricket, one of which being "The Wisdom of the Willow".
-- Aristotle, May 09 2003


I think the Canadians have us all beat with curling.
-- Worldgineer, May 09 2003


do you count gurning, marbles and worm raising?
-- po, May 09 2003


Sport: American Football is listed as such so as not to offend real Football, er, Soccer aficionados, who are listed as such so as not to offend unreal, er, fake Football, er, American Football fans.
-- thumbwax, May 09 2003


anyway its Footie!
-- po, May 09 2003


So a footie Dream Team, then?
Making apologies for the European bias:
Oliver Khan
Roberto Carlos
Sami Hyypia
Sinisa "Chopper" Mihailovic
Lilian Thuram
Barry "Ned" Ferguson
Zinedine Zidane
Edgar Davids
Ronaldo
Gabriel Batistuta
Ian Rush.

Subs:
Gianluigi Buffon
Craig "Token Australian" Moore
Chic Charnley
Javier Saviola
Wayne "Brick Shithouse" Rooney.

Manager: Jossy Blair
Referee: Pierluigi Collina, because he looks like an alien anyway.
-- my face your, May 09 2003


Wot, no Carlton Palmer in your world team.
-- sufc, May 09 2003


Wouldn't be fair - we need to give the aliens a chance, lest they take the huff and blow us up.
Top Carlton Palmer Fact: As a boy, he was part of the Boy Scout troop that held the world hopscotch record.
-- my face your, May 09 2003


//In reality, aliens will probably insist that we play their games. Complicated alien games weighted down with a billion years of rulemaking. Games that will probably have very little interest for humans... unless there's nudity involved.//

Intergalactic strip poker?
-- snarfyguy, May 09 2003


Yes!

Poker, I'm there.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, May 09 2003


Took some thinking about, but here goes nothing...

Goalkeepers

Richard Wright, Brad Friedel, Carlo Cudicini.

Defence

Roberto Carlos, John Terry, Liliam Thuram, Sol Campbell.

Midfield

David Beckham, Zinedine Zidane, Denis Bergkamp, Patrick Viera, Robert Pires, Damien Duff, Jay Jay Okocha.

Strikers

Raul, Christian Vieri, Roonaldo, Ronaldo, Ruud VanNistelrooy, Thierry Henry.

Manager

David Moyes.

Take your pick from any of those players, for a world beating team. I make no apologies for any Everton bias... 7th place (in the toughest league in the world) speaks for itself.

Players like Henrik Larsson and Ryan Giggs are close to making the first team, and would probably make the squad.
-- MikeOliver, May 12 2003


You're expecting these aliens tomorrow?
-- thumbwax, May 12 2003


I was expecting them years ago...

You will notice theer are many young players in the team, so we should be ok for a few years still.

This is obviously a current world XI... Any suggestions of a World XI for 2103 would be interesting to say the least...

I reckon Brooklyn Beckham may make the team in 20 years.

Just imagine Brooklyn and Romeo the new Gary and Phill? Poor kids...
-- MikeOliver, May 12 2003


Gary and Phil Neville's dad is called Neville. Neville Neville. Oh yes.
-- my face your, May 12 2003


Where was Billy the Fish in those fantasy lists?
-- Aristotle, May 12 2003


Has anyone spoken to David Icke about arranging the fixture?
-- Gordon Comstock, May 12 2003


We would need a neutral ground to play on... Or would we play a home and away leg...

If so, how would our players to survive the journey to the second leg.

//Plus I don't think soccer is a british sport, The egyptians had it roughly 500 years before the brits . see link if you want//

I followed the link and found

"Formal rules of today's game were adopted in England in 1863."

I reckon that makes it ours.
-- MikeOliver, May 13 2003


The oldest football club in the world is from sunny Sheffield. See link.
-- sufc, May 13 2003


Who did they play against?
-- MikeOliver, May 15 2003


Club members organised teams such as the first half of the alphabet (A-M) against the rest, professional occupations v the others, married men v unmarried etc, but soon other Sheffield teams had come into being beginning with Hallam Football Club in 1860.
By 1862 there were fifteen organised teams in and around Sheffield. In 1863 the Football Association was formed by a loose federation of clubs in the London area. Although playing under different rules, the members of the FA and Sheffield Club agreed to a challenge match between London and Sheffield at Battersea Park on March 31st 1866. Decisions were taken in advance regarding the rules and so the historic clash took place with London running out eventual winners.
Sheffield FC became one of the constituent clubs of the Sheffield FA in 1877, which also included:- Albion, Artillery and Hallamshire Rifles, Attercliffe, Brightside, Brincliffe, Broomhall, Crookes, Exchange, Exchange Brewery, Fir Vale, Gleadless, Hallam, Heeley, Kimberworth, Millhouses, Norfolk, Norfolk Works, Owlerton, Oxford, Parkwood Springs, Philadelphia, Surrey, Thursday Wanderers and Wednesday.
Sheffield Club were also closely involved in 1889 in the formation of the Sheffield United Football Club at Bramall Lane, providing some players for selected early games and joining in practice matches with the United professionals. The following years saw professionalism take over the game, and due to Sheffield's insistence on maintaining its amateur status, the club has found itself overshadowed by its city neighbours.
Taken from the link I've posted.
-- sufc, May 15 2003


Notts County is the oldest *surviving* club, which is kind of a more meaningful record. They were also the inspiration behind Juventus' black and white striped kit.

[MikeOliver] : "7th place (in the toughest league in the world) speaks for itself" - yes, doesn't it mean there are six squads of players better than yours? :-)

And the word soccer has British roots, being an early twentieth-century public (that means private) school abbreviation of "association football." Personally, I don't like the word either.

My team: Buffon, Carlos, Ferdinand, Tudor, Thuram, Giggs, Nedved, Zidane, Figo, Raul, Van Nistelrooy
-- trigger, May 15 2003


Sheffield FC IS the oldest club and the oldest surviving club.

"Sheffield Football Club is The Oldest Football Club In The World being formed on 24th October 1857. Thus the City of Sheffield can lay claim to being the birthplace of modern football. The two men responsible were Nathaniel Creswick, a solicitor and chairman of a silver-plate company,and William Prest, a wine merchant."
Taken from the link up above called Sheffield FC.
-- sufc, May 15 2003


This is the point where the token Australian pipes up and says:

Sport: Football should mean Aussie Rules

And his New South Welsh friend punches him in the arm and says "Sport:Football should mean Rugby League"

It gets very confusing down here, where there are three shows on called "The Footy Show", an Aussie Rules, a Rugby League and a Soccer show.

Everyone has a different idea of what "football" is, full credit to jutta for keeping them distinct.
-- reap, May 15 2003


In the Uk there is Football, Rugby Union and Rugcy League
-- sufc, May 15 2003


But we only care about footy ('cept those in widnes, wigan and hull... and leeds now that their footy team is shit).
-- MikeOliver, May 16 2003


Sorry I should have said Notts County are the oldest surviving Football League club - I have no argument that Sheffield FC still exists.

Anyway re. half baked ideas for soccer or football or whatever are largely redundant because the game is perfect. The only things that would improve it are

1- No summer break 2 - Electronic eyes for offsides and goal line decisions 3 - Being able to drink beer in your seat 4 - Reading FC in Europe 5 - Man U fighting and losing a painful season-long relegation battle
-- trigger, May 16 2003


Regarding our World XI, we would have to be careful not to include players who may well be double agents - e.g. Luke Chadwick, Ronaldo, Ronaldinho etc. They can't possibly be human.

-----------------------

//7th place (in the toughest league in the world) speaks for itself// *representative of 6th place Blackburn moons MikeOliver*.

----------------------

//It gets very confusing down here//

You know what else is confusing about Oz? Bert Newton. But we love him.

----------------------

btw, what was the idea again?
-- sambwiches, May 16 2003


I have a question about aliens playing football. How do you decide what parts of the body they can and cannot use on the ball. Say for example a race with six appendages (bilaterally symetrical). Do they get to use just the lower two legs or four legs? If they are trilateraly symetrical, are they limited to only using two legs? What if the grasping appendages are head mounted like insectile mandibles? Do they get to use them since the head is okay in football or are they prohibited since they are that races "hands"?

What about size differences? A race whose members are 10 meters cubes would have a wicked advantage in goal. Would the goal have to be resized to negate size advantage?

What if we meet a race consisting of black and white patterned balls? Do we really want to welcome them to our world by kicking around what looks like cousin Fleeb?
-- GenYus, Jun 22 2004


"Football" means Gaelic Football.
-- Goesta Berling, Jul 16 2006



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