As an aid to those afflicted by constipation, this new BorgCo product allows a one-off investment to take the place of multiple purchases of expensive laxatives.

Enter the cubicle, assume the position, adjust the G-setting, and press Start. Remember to grip the Dead Man's Handle - if you release it, the power is shut off.

The cubicle, on its gimballed frame, is spun up progressively to the desired level of gravitational force, assisting in the ejection of waste without the need for straining.
-- 8th of 7, Jan 23 2017

0-Gee Toilet 0-Gee_20Toilet
Similar Idea, though different in terms of applied forces. [Vernon, Jan 23 2017]

Alternate solution https://www.youtube...watch?v=YbYWhdLO43Q
Logically, it should at least reduce constipation events. [Vernon, Jan 23 2017]

I wish I'd thought of that.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 23 2017


Hopefully the settings for "cures extreme constipation" and "causes full body prolapse" aren't too close together.
-- FlyingToaster, Jan 23 2017


// the settings for "cures extreme constipation" and "causes full body prolapse" aren't too close together. //

That's specific to the individual user, and has to be determined experimentally.
-- 8th of 7, Jan 23 2017


"To the janitor : Please clean up the blood and mess - especially on the walls. We will be testing it on new volunteers Thursday. Better leave the windows open so things can air out a bit."
-- popbottle, Jan 23 2017


That might be considered unduly pessimistic, [pop] ....
-- 8th of 7, Jan 23 2017


It should (I think) be possible to alleviate constipation simply by placing a fairly-high-pressure but (and this is important) low flow-rate airhose down the oesophagus. Given that the entire gastrointestinal tract is somewhat elastic, it ought to distend around any obstruction to let the air pass through.

In theory, it should be possible to blow the system clean from the other end instead, but this is likely to be even more unpleasant than having a hose stuck down your oesophagus.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 23 2017


What about a device to inject oil ''round the sides?
-- Voice, Jan 23 2017


A nice big bowl of mercury taken beforehand would help this..
-- not_morrison_rm, Jan 23 2017


Yet another shit idea. +

<applause>
-- whatrock, Jan 23 2017


//What about a device to inject oil ''round the sides?// I think air would be more entertaining. A skilled proctologist ought to be able to get a tune out of it.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 23 2017


Two trailer park girls go 'round the outside, 'round the outside, 'round the outside.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jan 24 2017


// A skilled proctologist ought to be able to get a tune out of it. //

And what might an unskilled proctologist get out of it ...?
-- 8th of 7, Jan 24 2017


I am curious where the axis of rotation is? Somewhere midbody or just above the head? If above the head the user might need those MAST trousers to reduce the chance of blacking out. Given the circumstances these would be MAST trousers with a button up back flap.
-- bungston, Jan 24 2017


Yes, it's above the head. So yes, there's a risk of blacking out, hence the Dead Man's Handle.
-- 8th of 7, Jan 24 2017



random, halfbakery