A model steamroller, fuelled by liquid or solid fuel, which comes with a large folding ironing board/table that it runs on.
Place item to be ironed on the table. Fuel up the steamroller and allow it to reach working temperature.
The steamroller runs round the table; waste steam from the propulsion system is diverted into the front (perforated) roller to keep it hot and suitably steamy.
A mechanical "bump" detector ensures that when the steamroller reaches the rim at the edge of the board it reverses in a random direction and starts off again in a new one.
Actually does a really rubbish job of ironing clothes, but fun to watch.-- 8th of 7, Sep 23 2010 Traction Iron Traction_20Ironillustrated and redundant, unless I'm missing something? [xenzag, Sep 23 2010, last modified Sep 25 2010] Stanley Dryer Stanley_20DryerPerhaps one of these [theircompetitor, Sep 25 2010] [+] You could do this battery-powered and just spray the clothes first.-- gisho, Sep 23 2010 No, it has to have the whole living-flame-and-steam-engine thing to be worth the trouble.-- 8th of 7, Sep 23 2010 //Actually does a really rubbish job of ironing clothes, but fun to watch.//
Bun, unquestionably. [+]-- Boomershine, Sep 23 2010 [+]-- FlyingToaster, Sep 23 2010 The Borg does steampunk???????
??-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 23 2010 //rubbish job of ironing clothes, but fun to watch.// Hence, does a better job than a standard iron, which is no fun at all, and therefore goes unused. [+] (I think the //solid fuel// should be plutonium.)-- mouseposture, Sep 24 2010 + power it with accidentally washed receipts!-- Zimmy, Sep 25 2010 Add a little road gang of convict labourers, to spread the shirt flat... and ogle the girl washing her car (Cool Hand Luke reference).-- infidel, Sep 25 2010 [xen], this is similar but not identical. There is no handle on the top, nor a remote control, it is entirely autonomous.-- 8th of 7, Sep 25 2010 This just begs the question of why other small autonomous pieces of construction equipment can't fold clothing once its been steam rolled?-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Sep 25 2010 //[xen], this is similar but not identical// - ok, but it's essentially the same thing ie using a model steam roller to iron your clothes. You could have just added the remote control variation as an annotation to Traction Iron, but anyway....-- xenzag, Sep 25 2010 Re your tortoise idea [Ian Tindale] frustrating somehow. I really like it.
I picked up two bones for mine, despite spending hours working up an illustration for it..... such is the bakery.-- xenzag, Sep 25 2010 Can I just point out that I think all of you are underestimating the topological complexity of ironing a shirt?
I have actually watched ironing being done, and it's a completely baffling process.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 25 2010 [Maxwell_Buchannan], not content to argue that ironing is interesting, asserts that it's interesting to watch someone iron. At least if you equate "complex" and "baffling" with "interesting." [MB] is it as good as cricket?-- mouseposture, Sep 25 2010 //[MB] is it as good as cricket?//
It's better. Things move.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 25 2010 What's more, it doesn't go on for three days, then end in a draw. Mind you, with ironing, about a quarter of the time, the shirt wins ...-- 8th of 7, Sep 25 2010 True. Shirt bronzing, shirt silvering and shirt gilding are far more advanced, possibly because of the connotations of success and wealth associated with them.-- infidel, Sep 25 2010 Would certainly un-suckify ironing a little bit.-- doctorremulac3, Sep 25 2010 The iron doesn't suck, it blows.-- infidel, Sep 26 2010 //What's more, it doesn't go on for three days, then end in a draw.//
My ironing takes three days, then ends up in a drawer.-- Boomershine, Sep 27 2010 I could be interested in one, [8th]. I have refused to iron anything in the last 20 years. Anything to be ironed has gone into the Chinese laundry and comes back washed and ironed.
Next time I'm there I'll ask if they have one of these steamrollers. I think it will be hilarious, just to hear them trying to pronounce steamroller.-- infidel, Sep 27 2010 + I don't know how I missed this one, but I really need a cotton blouse ironed!!-- xandram, Sep 27 2010 Bakery never ceases to surprise me.... I still maintain that this is redundant as it's essentially that which I posted 4 years ago. ie a miniature steam roller that irons clothes. Judge for yourself.-- xenzag, Sep 27 2010 But, [xen] isn't yours a manually operated version?-- Boomershine, Sep 28 2010 I would suggest it's sufficiently different to be a separate idea. A traction engine is substantially different to a steamroller.-- infidel, Sep 28 2010 Well, the difference between a traction engine and a steamroller is pretty superficial in the context of the idea, but I would suggest that there is enough difference between the two ideas to justify their seperate and individual existences. I hate ironing, by the way, and have taken a similar attitude to infidel except that, if something really, really needs ironing then I just go out and buy a new one instead.-- DrBob, Sep 28 2010 [DrBob] I once inadvertantly bought a garment which was supposed to be ironed. I discovered that, by repeated cycles of machine-launder / tumble-dry, I could break its spirit. It now not only won't hold a crease, it won't hold a wrinkle, either.-- mouseposture, Sep 28 2010 Brilliant idea.
Ironing is a pointless task, so getting an autonomous device to do it in an entertaining manner is truly inspired. Add steam to the mix and we have genius.
Whether the task itself is adequately performed is completely irrelevent.
Why do poeple got to such lengths to iron things flat, when the intention is to wear them on a human body, which is almost entiely devoid of flat surfaces (not counting the chests of size zero models)?
Warm, buttered bun.-- Twizz, Sep 28 2010 [High Five for mouseposture]-- DrBob, Sep 28 2010 [xenzag] but I bunned both of the ideas!! I understand your dilemma, but life is full of close encounters!-- xandram, Sep 28 2010 I don't use or even own an iron (although my mother has one parked somewhere in my house) but this would be fab. (+)
Hmmm....how heavy would it be? Could I get it to roller my lawn or compress gravel paths etc.?-- squeak, Sep 29 2010 [marked-for-deletion] largely redundant with the linked idea "Traction iron"-- hippo, Sep 29 2010 random, halfbakery