She looked up from the couch. I could feel her eyes on me, and with the sudden realization that the background noise had abruptly ended, I inferred she had been talking to me. The look on her face betrayed the disappointment of having been talking for some time now, under the erroneous pretenses of me having been listening.
She stood up, and exclaimed “I’ve had enough! You are going to have to choose: The half bakery, or me!”
I nodded towards the front door as I posted my annotation, giggling to my self.
“Ha! Chew on that for a while.”
“What?” She was incredulous.
“No, no, I was referring to 8th of 7. He said …”
She left me mid-sentence.
She came by the next day to collect her stuff. As she came back inside from loading the final box, I rose from the computer desk to meet her at the door. She wanted closure. She wanted an explanation. I pressed a small business card into her hand. It read: “theotherhalfbakery.com”
Sooner or later, curiosity would get the better of her. With anger and trepidation she would visit “The other-half bakery, and find the explanations she was looking for. There she could meet and network with other jilted ex-lovers that had posed the very same ultimatum she had presented to me. There she could find solace by sharing her experiences of emotional neglect. There she would have a forum where she could post her experiences, and others could annotate their thoughts and vote on how big of a jerk I was.-- MikeD, Jul 06 2009 "Women. Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em."
[+]-- theleopard, Jul 07 2009 // can't shoot 'em. //
You can't ? Since when ?
Ooops......
[+] for the idea by the way. There's a huge market for that sort of mutual-assistance group.-- 8th of 7, Jul 07 2009 //There she could find solace by sharing her experiences of emotional neglect. There she would have a forum where she could post her experiences, and others could annotate their thoughts and vote on how big of a jerk I was. //
Widely known to exist in vitually all communications between females.
Whilst I'm afflicted with the social ineptitude typical of engineers (see my post 'woman translator') I am aware that women require communication beyond the basic facts of day to day living.
Bun for realising this and attempting to create a space for it.
I'll be interested to see wives & girlfriends reactions...-- Twizz, Jul 07 2009 Last time I heard you were playing Strip Darts, [MikeD]. What happened?-- gnomethang, Jul 07 2009 "What happened?" ... many women cannot live by beer, nudity and bread alone.-- dentworth, Jul 07 2009 I hope you're all having a lot of fun with this...+
And by the way, the old adage "if you can't beat em join em", doesn't work all the time here either, trust me, I know. 2 bakers under one roof, in my case, didn't work, as well. (Or should I say work out. ;-)-- blissmiss, Jul 07 2009 My wife once facebooked me to say that she doesn't need this type of escape. Then she tweeted/twittered the world on how unattentive her husband is. Then she gave me the cold shoulder/headache when I tried to give her some attention. Then she posted an idea on the bakery that garnered 2.5 buns. We are now seperated, but I think it was that last point that really got to her...-- 4whom, Jul 07 2009 //garnered 2.5 buns// Not in the oven then?
[+]-- shudderprose, Jul 07 2009 Well, yes in the oven! But given this "logarithmic measure" protocol we can't seem to get to three...Maybe I should try a different base?-- 4whom, Jul 07 2009 What a depressingly stupid idea. And what depressingly stupid annotations.-- zeno, Jul 08 2009 you forgot to mention the depressing stupidity of the score-- afinehowdoyoudo, Jul 10 2009 what do handbags or shopping have to do with it?-- afinehowdoyoudo, Jul 10 2009 Thank you [iron horse]. I was surprised that vagina jam got those very good ratings. But I kind of get that now, it's funny.
The crowd here is often smarter than I am. It takes me a while to catch on to the joke. I actually get some help when people explain stuff to me. Sometimes I don't get the joke because english is not my native tongue, sometimes I don't get the joke because I am below average IQ on the halfbakery. But this...
This is just plain stupid.-- zeno, Jul 11 2009 My own personal other half thought this was baked and almost emailed [Jutta] to ask to join. There is mileage in this concept, whether or not it's stupid.-- nineteenthly, Jul 13 2009 .................but the title is a pun!!-- xandram, Jul 13 2009 I just got back from a 4-day family visit sans HB. This idea had only been autoboned when I last checked it. Maybe I should leave more often.-- MikeD, Jul 13 2009 The Better-Half Bakery?-- Gamma48, Jul 13 2009 Or take the autoboner with you.-- blissmiss, Jul 13 2009 I don't know about that, [bliss]. The autoboner strikes me as the type that would tag along, but not offer any gas money.-- MikeD, Jul 13 2009 Well [zeno], I don't know.. I posted that anno while feeling depressed and stupid. As for the idea itself.. this site has seen worse, imho. Currently, voting neutral & praying for good things, ttboma-- afinehowdoyoudo, Jul 14 2009 & yes, I bought my own handbag.-- afinehowdoyoudo, Jul 14 2009 random, halfbakery