Product: Tool: Abrasive
Termite router   (+34)  [vote for, against]
Munched signage

In much the same fashion as a printed circuit board is designed, your piece of wood is impregnated with a chemical pattern which has areas of attraction and repulsion for termites.

After applying the termites, their progress is monitored for a period of time. When they have finished their work, they are rapidly retired via some means, such as irradiation / heat / cold / pressure / vacuum / chemicals / predators / being shifted to a new workpiece.

My insectly gnawed "Welcome" sign stands out in high relief. And if the termites could read, they would have realized they were lied to.
-- lurch, Sep 26 2006

Genius! Lying to termites is good, folks, they're little bastards and they deserve it... <twitch><mumble> I was there, you know, I mean, on the receiving end of a terrifying programme of psychological warfare from termites, they would eat a novel before I could finish it </mumble></twitch>
-- Azazello, Sep 26 2006


what [Azazello] said
-- pertinax, Sep 26 2006


Yeah, you just need to add an IP address to them and...what was the question, again?
-- Ling, Sep 26 2006


They would make better rep-eaters, shirley. (Sorry.)
-- Shz, Sep 26 2006


cool +
-- xandram, Sep 26 2006


Croissant for idea, supercroissant for the fun-to-sayness of the idea subtitle.
-- calum, Sep 26 2006


I had an idea a while back for a Termite Power tool - never fleshed it out and don't need to now, because this is much better. Get your termites to chew on this +
-- xenzag, Sep 26 2006


The steampunk in me likes the idea of termite circuit boards, but our vendors have long enough lead times to supply us in the old fashioned manner. (+)
-- normzone, Sep 26 2006


Write it, and I will vote.
-- normzone, Sep 27 2006


[Lurch] Maybe I'm wrong, but I think, that if at this point in your life , you are having a problem with termites, little signs ain't gonna work. But I will vote yes only because I picture you putting up little signs with your right hand, with your medication in the other.
-- SuperHole, Sep 27 2006


Chocolate might work. How can they not like chocolate?
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Sep 27 2006


Darn. I thought this was a Thermite Router
-- BunsenHoneydew, Sep 29 2006


... So did I.

Have you posted it yet? .. Hello [8th of 7]...
-- Custardguts, Oct 03 2011


I wonder if you could do this by routering out the sign with the smallest possible bit, then gluing a nonchewable surface flat against it and releasing the termite. I assert the termites will chew against the place where there already is some damage, enlarging the routed space and giving the illusion of organicity.
-- bungston, Oct 03 2011



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