T-shirts are all well and good when you're slim - a snuggish T shows off a broad upper body and a tapered waist nicely.
Sadly, however, I have neither of these attributes, thanks to the concerted effort of Cook. I am rapidly approaching the point where my midriff is my widest part.
One solution to this problem, of course, is to wear looser T-shirts. As long as the midriff is not *too* expansive, the loose T hangs from the upper body, and nobody can tell whether it conceals a slim, toned six-pack with room to spare, or a developing midriff which almost grazes the inside of the shirt.
However, I am planning ahead for that point where my middle is wider than my chest. When this happens, even the loosest T-shirt is of no use, as it will inevitably bulge around the navel area.
It would be easy to assume that the problem lies in the midriff being too large, but all things are relative. The problem can also be seen as one of having a chest narrower than the midriff.
Chest-narrower-than- midriff-woes begone!! MaxWair is inordinately proud to introduce the T-shirt Slimming Hoop.
Rather than trying to constrain the midriff (like a corset), the T- shirt Slimming Hoop works on a higher plane. It consists of a broad, ovalish springy hoop of lightweight plastic, with a carefully cunningly curved cross-section. A gap in the hoop allows it to be sprung open for easy fitting.
Simply slip the T-shirt Slimming Hoop around your chest, put on a loose-fitting T-shirt, adjust the Hoop for position and - testiculae canem! - you are done! The Hoop will spring out to support your T-shirt, giving the impression of a wide upper-body adorned with the relevant muscles or other items (gender-specific models are available). In comparison, even the most generous midriff will be concealed comfortably by the drape of the T-shirt from the hoop, restoring you to an apparent 5:3:4 ratio of chest:waist:hips.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 31 2010 Didn't work http://i.telegraph....on_epa_1460388c.jpg [calum, Jul 31 2010] Would be fascinating to see this on a 300 lb man. He'd have to go through doors sideways. Semper ubi sub ubi.-- mouseposture, Jul 31 2010 Baked. What do those American footballers wear under their shirts that makes their shoulders look so much broader than their waists? T-shirt hoops!-- Tulaine, Jul 31 2010 //testiculae canem//
Dog eat dog balls?...-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jul 31 2010 random, halfbakery