It appears from a brief and unrepresentative study of the available literature that some individuals identify themselves as "lactose intolerant".

In a modern, democratic* and culturally diverse society, such blatant prejudice is simply not acceptable.

Therefore, BorgCo Social Engineering propose to roll out a programme of re-education for these obnoxious bigots; this will consist of random violent beatings, lots of shouting, sleep deprivation, isolation, and forced consumption of dairy products until a permanent change of attitude is achieved.

*Allegedly
-- 8th of 7, Jun 30 2017

Can fructose be done with two dolls with genitalia?
-- wjt, Jul 01 2017


I had a weird idea that diabetes was the result of liver storage boredom. All this machinery and getting the same old monosaccharides.
-- wjt, Jul 01 2017


// a programme of re-education.. .. random violent beatings, lots of shouting, sleep deprivation, isolation, and forced consumption of dairy products//

Or, you know, supplementation with lactase tablets.

Either/or.
-- Custardguts, Jul 02 2017


Foods with cane juice, cane sugar, and high froctose corn syrup may be praised for their sugar diversity, unless it's discovered that they are systematically excluding some underprivileged sugar like lactose
-- caspian, Jul 03 2017


Lactose could be taught with a guillotine and a foot.
-- wjt, Jul 03 2017


I understand that in some restaurants, even in the most progressive parts of the world, they still refuse to serve certain macronutrients.
-- b153b, Jul 04 2017


// explosive diarrhea //

Interestingly, picric acid (trinitrophenol) is both an explosive and a highly effective laxative.

Indeed, for the laxative effect, it doesn't even need to be ingested*. In response to the question "What's in that shell you've just dug up ?", the reply "Hmm, the markings suggest a picric acid filling" are more than sufficient to provoke instantaneous lower rear sphincter dilatation in even the most sanguine of military archaeologists ...

* or introduced into the alimentary canal in amy way whatsoever.
-- 8th of 7, Jul 05 2017


I detect some outrageous cultural appropriation going on here; I mean, has anyone even talked to any actual pobbles?
-- pertinax, Jul 06 2017



random, halfbakery