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Food: Cookie: Fortune Cookie
Specific Fortune Cookies   (+8, -1)  [vote for, against]
Vagueness has gone too far. It must be combatted.

Fortune cookies are almost always frustratingly vague, sometimes even to the point of ludicrousness ("something good is just around the corner"). Even curiouser, I've recently recieved a few fortunes that AREN'T ACTUALLY FORTUNES. "You have a way with words" isn't exactly a shining prediction of the future.

The next time I eat Chinese food I want to get a fortune cookie that says "You will die next thursday", or maybe "Someone will step on your foot in 5 minutes and 37 seconds."

Emoticons might be added for effect - "You will die next Thursday :( ". Or, alternately, to lighten weighty news -- "You will die next Thursday :)".
-- Tlogmer, Mar 16 2002

Unusual Fortune Cookie Collection http://home.nc.rr.c.../fortunes_index.htm
Photos of odd fortune cookie fortunes. Small collection but nicely done. [bristolz, Mar 16 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

Not _exactly_ what you are looking for. http://www.homestar...er.com/fortune.html
Flash fortune cookies. Try them multiple times for seconds of fun. [swamilad, Oct 04 2004]

Something I've wanted to see in a fortune cookie is either "Berware the Ides of March!" or "You Have Just Enjoyed an Inferior Meal."
-- Mr_Thundercleese, Mar 16 2002


You have gone batty _^0^_.
-- neelandan, Mar 16 2002


the chef pissed in your hot and sour soup-have a nice day.
-- IvanIdea, Mar 16 2002


Sorry, I've retired from correcting typos, there are just too many and I really do have bigger fish to fly. Also, I may just need to "Berware the Ides of March".
-- El Pedanto, Mar 16 2002


My favorite is: "That wasn't chicken".
-- phoenix, Mar 16 2002


"Find a bucket & quick"
-- po, Mar 16 2002


How about a web site with a CGI form to let you submit a fortune, to be printed as part of the next batch of fortune cookies?
-- Jeremi, Mar 17 2002


I recently went to a Chinese restaurant and got a fortune cookie that said, "Help! I'm trapped in a fortune cookie factory!"
-- Pseudonym #3, Mar 17 2002


My all time favorite fortune: "You may be hungry soon: order take-out now."
-- vladimir_gustav, Mar 18 2002


I used to eat at a chinese buffet for lunch every day until my cookie fortune read: "Try something new".
-- MORGWOOD, Mar 18 2002


I think Penn & Teller had an idea for one that said That lump is cancer.
-- vanbilder, Aug 10 2003


What about "Siht daer ot rorrim a deen lliw uoy"?
-- Canuck, Aug 10 2003


A pastry is in your future. (+)

It works!
-- Cedar Park, Aug 10 2003


I've always thought it would be cute to put a marriage proposal in your date's fortune cookie.
-- Tabbyclaw, Aug 11 2003


Tried it once. She married the chef.
-- Cedar Park, Aug 12 2003


I wanted to do this at a party once. I considered pulling all the fortunes out and substituting my own, but the cookies were sealed too well. Then I considered baking them myself, but the expense of the heat resistant paper and ink was too great. So, yes, I would like to see these either mass produced or in the form of a DIY kit.
-- Detly, Aug 13 2003


In some hole-in-the-wall chinese joint in Michigan I got a fortune that stated "You love chinese food". Seriously... I still have it, just to show people when they don't believe me.
-- JRandMoby, Aug 19 2003


"Dial 1-800-MISS-CLEO for real fortune."

Wierd, huh?
-- DesertFox, May 07 2004


Your luck number:
6 19 21 25 35 50

Pretty specific, huh?
-- phundug, May 09 2004


To make just about any fortune cookie fun, have a fellow diner ask you a question. I asked my friend what lay ahead in his love life and his fortune was "Constant grinding will reduce an iron rod to a steel needle."
-- Eugene, May 09 2004


I've had this idea myself! I love it! Sometimes normal fortune cookies are funny though, when the translations are poor. I got one that said, "listen more to mother's exhortations."
-- EdisonsTwin, Jul 17 2006



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