I'm sitting on a couch which could desperately use this feature. Hidden suction vents under the cushions in each side, along the back and down the middle could be activated periodically to collect any dust and hair as well as coins you and your guests may unknowingly deposit on in or around your couch.-- jaksplat, Dec 15 2004 Extremely unrelated Hickey_20StampsAss hickeys must be well placed in the collective unconscious. Or at least in the bakery.... [daseva, Apr 22 2009] wow.-- neilp, Dec 15 2004 Furthermore, all that crap it collects could be used to stuff the cushions.-- Detly, Dec 15 2004 I just visited the Nordstrum's, they have a wonderful dining setting, but boy their couch really sucks.-- benfrost, Dec 15 2004 If your house has central vacuuming, just plug a hose from the back of the couch into the wall.-- krelnik, Dec 15 2004 Could include a numerical display to tell you how many cents worth of coins are under there :) This way you'd know if it was worth activating the machine.-- phundug, Dec 15 2004 It'd have the added benefit of scaring the pets off of the couch.-- jaksplat, Dec 15 2004 I am truly embarrassed to be the one to point this out, but if you left it running and vented it outdoors, this would also function as a fart control mechanism.
[hangs head in shame]-- normzone, Dec 15 2004 I would think that you would also want a blower connected to the cushions to push all the dust out of those (where it would then be inhaled by the vacuum at the cracks). Otherwise the thing would act like a dust magnet (btw, old parlor organs in the U.S. were amazingly effective dust magnets, since they all operated off vacuum; interestingly most European ones operated off positive pressure. I wonder whether the different designs are indicative of relative air quality in the late 1800's?).-- supercat, Dec 15 2004 Grand Opening: The Attack of the Hungry Couches!
Opening scene: Billy and his dad are sitting down to watch the game. There is a noise. Billy's dad get up to see what it is. Nothing is there, but when he comes back, Billy is gone. Only a slight depression in the couches is left. That, and a slightly muffled "Help" heard as if very far away....-- DesertFox, Dec 16 2004 I swear honey, that's not a hickey on my ass.-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Dec 16 2004 Are ass hickeys really that popular?? <linky>-- daseva, Apr 22 2009 random, halfbakery