Product: Torch
Pump Action Torch   (+3, -1)  [vote for, against]
point into the dark and shoot

Pump Action Torch looks like a shotgun, but it's actually a really powerful torch.

You load in the multiple batteries using the same action as per the insertion of cartridges into a pump action shotgun. (see car chase scene in Bullitt when the shotgun gets loaded)

When you pull the trigger, instead of a deadly blast of lead shot, a powerful beam of light is emitted.

Advantages: heavy and well engineered; appeals to "gun-nuts"; extremely powerful torch; requires no license; scares people; doubles up as a cudgel.

Disadvantages: scared people may shoot you if they have real guns; not a great accessory to carry on a date; may get you arrested when used in its cudgel mode.
-- xenzag, Nov 12 2020

bring this as a backup EverReady_2045
[xenzag, Nov 12 2020]

//spoof or art or both// - by ‘both’ though, do you mean ‘spoof art’ - i.e. fake art, or an ‘art spoof’ - i.e. a spoof of such creativity that it is raised to the level of art? This is an important distinction.
-- hippo, Nov 12 2020


//many of your ideas are offered as spoof or art or both// I'd like to think that is All of my ideas. This is after all The Halfbakery.
-- xenzag, Nov 12 2020


The spoof of the pudding......
-- xenzag, Nov 12 2020


It's possible to modify the low-lethality 38mm ARWEN baton round by pulling the elastomer projectile out of the case using the corkscrew on a Swiss Army knife, and replacing it with a "D" cell wrapped in greaseproof or waxed paper to form a sabot, thus allowing the weapon to deliver a much more painful, damaging injury over a far longer range. It's possible to actually cause fractures of limbs with a properly-placed shot, leaving the victim writhing on the ground in agony.

Of course, no officer with a working moral compass* would ever allow the men under his command to do such a thing, let alone hold clandestine classes in the back of a truck demonstrating the exact reloading technique.

We will award a [+] for the very reasons that make [kdf] uneasy.

We would very much like to know how "powerful" a beam of light is emitted; for example, in a comparative test, how does it match up against a phased plasma rifle in the 40 Watt range ?

*Unless they maybe left it in the pocket of their other uniform, and forgot to bring it.
-- 8th of 7, Nov 12 2020


You don't carry much stock, do you ? We're going to try Maynard's pawnshop, then.
-- 8th of 7, Nov 12 2020


if you want to expend a battery's entire charge in a very bright flash, you'll need to drain it into a capacitor ahead of firing time.
-- Loris, Nov 12 2020


WIFRT: I was expecting the "pump action" would generate electricity, to be stored (although not necessarily...) to power the torch. (I had a squeeze- handle type dynamo torch back in the 1980's; a superior design to the "crank handle" more common now.)
-- neutrinos_shadow, Nov 13 2020


Probably not the best ergonomics for a torch to cover a wild range of practical uses. Predator shoulder torch?
-- wjt, Nov 15 2020



random, halfbakery