Inside the handle of a large chef's knife lie an accelerometer, mirocontroller, and miniature audio player. When a series of stabbing motions are detected by the accelerometer, sounds of falling water and screeching violins play through a small hermetically sealed speaker.
Power consumption is low, and can be provided by a supercapacitor. The blade is inductively charged when placed in the knife block, making it completely waterproof and zero-maintenance.-- Aq_Bi, Jul 01 2007 [zero-maintenance] - It's elf - sharpening?-- normzone, Jul 01 2007 No, it's one of those infomercial knives that are "Guaranteed to Never Need Sharpening!" Btw, I don't find my-elf using many stabbing motions while cutting in the kitchen...-- neutrinos_shadow, Jul 01 2007 ...ever try cracking open a coconut? [n_s]-- xandram, Jul 02 2007 I always use a hammer for that. Is that somehow wrong?-- shapu, Jul 02 2007 "It's curtains for that steak"-- skinflaps, Jul 02 2007 In nasal tone: rhee! rhee! rhee! [+]-- fancypants, Jul 02 2007 random, halfbakery