A track would be built inside all the walls of the Louvre with glass on one side. The Mona Lisa would travel throughout the museum at about 3 miles per hour. Sections along the path would be numbered and you'd sign up to stand on your assigned number at the time the Mona Lisa passes by you so you wouldn't have any waiting time. "Oh, 2:15, our private 60 second exhibit is in 5 minutes, let's get to our space."

You'd have to show your assigned code on your phone to a reader on that section or the painting would be blacked out so nobody would be able to cheat. If they ran to a section reserved for somebody else the screen would be blacked out.

People following her around would be mocked and disparaged.

Actually, instead of traveling slowly, it would zip from cubicle to cubicle and just stay there for one minute so you have 60 seconds to take your stupid selfie before it quickly moves to the next cubicle.

Now somebody could say "Why not just have scheduled viewings at one spot with it not moving around?" You'd still have a mess of people trying to get to that one spot, sometimes rushing and even pushing other people out of the way, this spreads the viewing area to all over the facility with no lines or crowds in any particular area.

In other words, it disburses the crowd and the line, breaks it into little pieces. You just relaxedly proceed to your viewing point and wait a minute or two just to play it safe. Beats waiting for hours.
-- doctorremulac3, Sep 12 2023

Inspired by Xenzag's idea. I_27m_20The_20Mona_20Lisa
She suggested having dozens all around the facility, only one being real. I stole that and modified it to being dozens of viewing cubicles that the original cycles through. [doctorremulac3, Sep 12 2023]

d'apres Jean Genet https://memoirsofth...insofarembrandt.pdf
... the man once compared to "a rather intelligent button mushroom". [pertinax, Sep 21 2023]

//it disburses the crowd//

That would be an impressive and surreal sight, albeit slightly disturbing; an extension into meatspace of the monetisation of eyeballs. However, it is more likely that the proposed idea would just disperse the crowd.
-- pertinax, Sep 12 2023


Occurs to me, you could just have the whole art gallery on an assembly line. Sit in your booth drinking wine and chat about the paintings as they pass by.
-- doctorremulac3, Sep 12 2023


"Ah yes, this was from Picasso's 'motion blur' period"
-- hippo, Sep 13 2023


hehehe
-- Voice, Sep 13 2023


Could also have a massive array of Fresnel lenses in front of the original so millions of people could view it close up simultaneously
-- pocmloc, Sep 13 2023


Millions? The painting would flashburn from the extra light needed.
-- Voice, Sep 13 2023


Plug everyone's brain into the neurolink net and you could need only one set of eyes looking at it.
-- RayfordSteele, Sep 13 2023


Or cut it into loads of tiny pieces and distribute them. That way people can genuinely say they saw {a part of} the original.
-- pocmloc, Sep 13 2023


Excellent category choice by the way.
-- pocmloc, Sep 13 2023


Oops. Thx
-- doctorremulac3, Sep 13 2023


//She// Wait, I've been living in a bubble all these years.

All this time I've been flirting with a girl. Oh, my heavens.

But wait a minute...this sounds better than I thought. A more empathetic perspective, understanding, kinder, more well rounded, easier to maintain peace with...Yup, I accept this dose of reality with much gratitude.
-- blissmiss, Sep 19 2023


Sounds like a great premise for a Hollywood movie.

//pretending to be a man who only pretended to be a woman//

Sort of...
-- blissmiss, Sep 20 2023


Jean Genet was thinking something similar, [pocmloc] - see link.
-- pertinax, Sep 21 2023


No, Streisand. I never say V/V.
-- blissmiss, Sep 21 2023



random, halfbakery