In these dark times, etc.
I suppose we're measuring some combination of neural state and endocrine state, but I'm more interested in the latter - not the cognitive condition of being convinced that the last bit of sausage has one's name on it in spite of all evidence to the contrary, but the feeling that goes with that.-- pertinax, May 02 2017 millihelen https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/millihelen [hippo, May 03 2017] I think you'll find that arms manufacturers and wall construction companies will be up in the kilospaniels.-- MaxwellBuchanan, May 02 2017 The Spaniel will be like the Farad - far too large for practical use. A Spaniel is such a huge unit of irrepressible excitement and enthusiasm that it doesn't translate to a human context.
Even a toddler with ADHD who has been transfused intravenously with Sunny Delight on Christmas morning is only going to register at about 45 microSpaniels.
The breed and age of the reference standard Spaniel will need to be carefully specified, as an eight-month-old Springer Spaniel puppy who's just seen a duck jump into a pond will overload even the most robust instrumentation.-- 8th of 7, May 02 2017 The Henry is a splendid measure.-- DenholmRicshaw, May 02 2017 Personally, I prefer the SI unit of Zen enlightenment, the Ohmm.-- MaxwellBuchanan, May 02 2017 I'm resisting ....-- normzone, May 02 2017 ...is it futile?-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, May 02 2017 It is.
Don't say we didn't tell you.-- 8th of 7, May 02 2017 You didn't tell me.-- MaxwellBuchanan, May 02 2017 We told you not to tell us that.-- 8th of 7, May 02 2017 I must resist on the basis of the prefix. We are in enough trouble with the only other SI unit with a prefix, the kilogram.
"What's a kilogram?"
"that's 1.0 x 10exp3 grams"
"what's a gram?"
"easy, that's one millikilogram, 0.001 of the SI unit of mass"
"so the SI unit of mass is a thousand times one thousandth of itself?"
"yep"
"how did that mess happen?"
"The French, mostly."-- bs0u0155, May 02 2017 // French //
Sp. "french", Pr. "Evil smelly foreign gits"-- 8th of 7, May 02 2017 Alternatively, you could use the Megaretreiver, or the inverse decidoberman as a standard unit.-- RayfordSteele, May 02 2017 A Yocto Shih Tzu might help with that bit of sausage...-- xandram, May 03 2017 (c.f. "millihelen" - see link)-- hippo, May 03 2017 // Shih Tzu might help //
You've never really made the acquaintance of a pedigree Tzu, have you ? We can tell.
The idea of a Tzu ever doing anything "helpful" is hilarious.
Try the following:
Take a very large dog, and identify all the positive features that dogs are reknowned for - loyalty, stamina, obedience, bravery, and patience.
Then throw all those away, because they're not needed. Double up on the quantities of greed, egotism, idleness and self-interest. Cram in intelligence, malice, and total contempt for any other living thing until there's no space left. Squash down the resulting Size 13 personality into a Size 2 body, assembled from components from Mugwai, Ewoks, and other super-cute creatures, including thick, soft, Chinchilla-like fur.
Instill an overweening sense of arrogance and self-importance (minimal explanation required) and let it loose upon the world to cause chaos and bewilderment.-- 8th of 7, May 03 2017 Almost, but not quite. They don't shed fur. They don't scratch furniture. They don't crap in other people's flower beds. They don't howl at 0330 on a Sunday morning. They don't slaughter songbirds. They don't strew fleas everywhere they go. They don't vomit copiously behind the sofa. They are hypoallergenic. They don't leave half-mice in the middle of the kitchen floor ...-- 8th of 7, May 03 2017 //Is this about [...]?//
No, this is about thousandths of the hopefulness of a spaniel.
Perhaps you want next door. I think they might have a "younger - people - born - a - couple - of - decades - before - the - Y2K - bug R us" franchise there.-- pertinax, May 04 2017 Ah, you can't get me that way; I don't believe in generations.
Also, I don't think you mean "transpires". Not really.-- pertinax, May 05 2017 Surely a transpire is just an undead person with gender issues?-- MaxwellBuchanan, May 06 2017 random, halfbakery