After a rather bland weekend of watching hordes of men run back and forth across a field after an oddly-shaped ball, I decided that the game of American football needs a new element to liven it up. So for now on, all of the players should play in full mascot gear.
They should be required to wear giant head and all, and perform their ritual end-zone victory-dance in the manner that their mascot animal / mineral / vegetable would conduct themselves.
"If the Jets are going to win this game, they've gotta take advantage of the Colts two-person horse costume and run some dividing routes to split up the defensive tacklers in two directions..." "You've nailed it exactly, Boomer. Unfortunately for the quarterback, those foam-rubber wings are slowing down their wide receivers and they can't quite get open before he's trampled by a herd of Colt hoofs..."-- RayfordSteele, Dec 08 2002 Even sillier... http://www.mascot-g.../images/6_BMGN3.jpgEvery year, UK football mascots run a steeplechase. [st3f, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 17 2004] Gamecube football game with 'mascot mode' http://gamecube.gam...zreviews/r20201.htm [Monkfish, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004] A history of bizarre mascot incidents http://sportsillust...t_timeline/?cnn=yes [bonkers777, Feb 16 2009] Might get me watching American "Football" again.-- thumbwax, Dec 08 2002 Any badger mascots in American football ?-- skinflaps, Dec 08 2002 Yep. Wisconson... I don't want to picture the Beavers...-- RayfordSteele, Dec 08 2002 I know I shouldn't but I love it when those mascots knock seven bells out of each other.-- po, Dec 09 2002 Why stop with just wearing the costumes? Make them functional - each team gets some "special ability" appropriate for the mascot. So the Jets get jetpacks, maybe the Colts can be on horseback, Buffalo Bills get (tranquilizer) rifles...-- karunai, Dec 09 2002 Mascot games have been a popular halftime event for years. No one's yet been able to lead a banker to believe that they'd be amusing as more than an occasional novelty, but there are probably stupider sports on the air.-- Monkfish, Dec 09 2002 random, halfbakery