The unicycle - one of humanity's greatest achievements.
However, although the unicycle is miraculous, it suffers from the drawback of being visible. Hence, the illusion of someone levitating whilst moving their feet in small circles is lost.
Visible Unicycle Disillusionment Woes Begone!!
MaxCo. is proud to introduce its range of invisible* unicycles.
The MaxCo. Invisible Unicycle (for such is the name which our marketing department has crafted for the apparatus) consists of a large (1.5-2m) disc of the finest tempered and toughened glass, thinned somewhat at the edges to minimise their visibility.
Affixed to one side of the disc, about a foot from the centre, is a small protruding rod. Affixed to the opposite side of the disc, diametrically opposite the first rod, is a second rod. These rods are your pedals.
Also provided are a pair of MaxCo. Invisible Unicycling Shorts. These fashionable netherwear items, hand-crafted from the finest Lycradex, feature a gusset studded with captive roller-bearings, covering what can only be described as the perineal area of the rider.
In use, the rider sits astride the disc, placing one foot on each of the protruding rods. The edge of the disc engages with the aforementioned perineal roller-bearings.
A pedalling action, familiar to any seasoned unicyclist, is then all that is required to operate the MaxCo. Invisible Unicycle.
To spectators viewing the spectacle from the side, the rider will appear to be suspended above the ground, feet circling wildly has he (or indeed she) glides effortlessly along.
*your results may vary-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 02 2012 Scrotal_20Fortification [calum, Jul 02 2012] Finally, a new application for my idea... Bicycle_20Seat_20Shorts [normzone, Jul 02 2012] Ah - I see that [bungston] has some prior art in the perineal region.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 02 2012 //thinned somewhat at the edges// so, a lens?-- pocmloc, Jul 02 2012 Lensish, yet not lensoid. The greater part of the disc is flat, so as not to distort the scene viewed through it. Only the edges are tapered, so as to avoid having a very thick and obvious rim. There will of course be some distortion as a result of the tapering, but compromises are inevoidable.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 02 2012 OK but I think that a disk of toughened glass would be better described as “transparent” rather than “invisible”.
I think I once saw someone wearing a pair of Invisible Unicycling Shorts, though. At least, their shorts -looked- invisible to me.-- pocmloc, Jul 02 2012 //a disk of toughened glass would be better described as “transparent” rather than “invisible”//
I ran your suggestion past our marketing division, and they inagree.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 02 2012 // the rider will appear to be suspended above the ground, feet circling wildly //
This effect can also be produced, sans unicycle, by simply propelling somebody into the air in an unexpected fashion, such as, for instance, with the aid of an invisible trebuchet. Although, if this feat is performed properly, the word 'rider' would be most aptly replaced with 'victim', and the phrase 'suspended above' with 'plummeting toward'.
Other than that, it's remarkably similar. [+]-- Alterother, Jul 02 2012 //effect can also be produced, sans unicycle, by simply propelling somebody into the air// That is true, but the effect thereby created cannot be sustained for significant periods of time, unless orbital velocity can be attained.
Orbital speeds, sadly, give few spectators time to appreciate the spectacle adequately before the person passes by andor achieves transient incandescence.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 02 2012 You can achieve a remarkably similar effect by another means, elucidated in an idea I've just posted, using nylon fishing lines and very small hooks.-- UnaBubba, Jul 03 2012 In the right circumstances, a mirror disk would be invisibler than a glass disk.-- hippo, Jul 03 2012 And have the advantage of showing whether you were walking beside a vampire, as you viewed your reflection.-- UnaBubba, Jul 03 2012 //I ran your suggestion past our marketing division, and they inagree.
Come, come now..that's differently agree-- not_morrison_rm, Jul 03 2012 // they inagree.
Come, come now..that's differently agree//
No, they were indifferent.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 03 2012 So invisible unicycling is an indoor sport, presumably? Out of doors, you'd have to contend with the appearance of hovering about on a circle of mud. Anyway, inside is better for hearing what I'm sure is a delightful sound of crotch bearings on the edge of glass.-- tatterdemalion, Jul 03 2012 The MaxCo. Invisible Unicycle is fully outdoorized and ruggedly terrained. Use on soft or ineven surfaces is not recommended. Your contents may settle with prolonged use. In the event of a reaction, discontinue or continue use, depending on nature of reaction. Open other end.-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 03 2012 This side up.-- Alterother, Jul 03 2012 But your instructions are unclear which spoils the whole effect.-- AusCan531, Jul 03 2012 They're not "instructions", they're "unstructions". We had to make this change after our legal department became unvolved.
For similar reasons, we may be forced to rename our product as an "Unvisible Inicycle" to avoid some rather untimidating liability issues.
(Ah - I have just received a memo from our legal department, unforming me that the legal department will henceforth be known as the cheese department. Apparently this too is a pre- emptive measure to avoid liability issues.)-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 03 2012 Do you mean
"your instructions are unclear, which spoils the whole effect"
or
"your instructions are unclear - which spoils the whole effect ?"-- 8th of 7, Jul 03 2012 “your instructions are; unclear which spoils the whole effect”-- pocmloc, Jul 04 2012 "Yes"-- AusCan531, Jul 04 2012 random, halfbakery