recently, an exchange-student friend of mine from uni started exploring the swearing dimension of the english language. When I caught wind of this, not only did I find it hillarious, but also unlike any trype of profanity commonly used.
The things he was saying were generally just disturbing, and really really inappropriate, and not neccesarily vulgar.
I think what he was doing was a mixing between what he percieves as offensive in English, and direct translations from profanities in his native tongue (Polish)....whatever, its a bizzaro combo
Some of the things he said
"I'm going to spray you all over me" (to a guy)
"I'll take that, rip it up, and shove it up my OWN ass" (to me)
"get on top of me" (to a guy in another car following a small episode of road rage)
"you're making me hard" (in a beach yolleyball game to the opposing team)
and several more i just cant remember.
Just hearing these types of innappropriate, disturbing derrogatory comments used in such wrong context is so confusing, that you forget the issue that brought them up. The situation becomes one of awkward silences, confused looks, and perhaps (as in my case) a chuckle or two....in most cases though, I believe if profanities like this were used, more situations would be diffused due to sheer confusion and awkwardness.-- shinobi, Sep 11 2005 Seize the day ... http://www.bawls.com/and drink Bawls. [reensure, Sep 14 2005] There is an obvious reason why smutty talk is nearly always so poorly done: lack of practice.
Some folk just know how to nail one down.-- reensure, Sep 11 2005 Ha! Unfortunately, it seems like an excellent companion to ‘Use Bizarre Metaphors,’ which was MFD’d, and 'confuse and bewilder people,' which was not.-- ldischler, Sep 11 2005 //Some folk just know how to nail one down.//
Yeah, the truly talented will now precisely whether to use:"Shut the f*** up" or "F***in' shut it."-- Jinbish, Sep 11 2005 ... or, even "F***er!"-- reensure, Sep 11 2005 At my work we sometimes translate english swearwords directly, literally, into our own language. If I reverse the process you would get something like this:
Ball bag. (to a guy)
Hopping vagina. (about a girl)
(funny if you are in the mood)-- zeno, Sep 11 2005 That's the snizel, iszil?-- reensure, Sep 11 2005 Ball bag is a term of endearment here.
"Ball bag," you might say when greeting a male friend/colleague. It's synonomous with "maaate".-- Texticle, Sep 12 2005 - Klautsac-- shinobi, Sep 12 2005 What an intercoursing stupid idea. Bun-- coprocephalous, Sep 12 2005 I'll write your name on my balls!-- benindubai, Sep 12 2005 The more Scottish version of "Ball bag" is much better: "Baw Bag" or the more sedate "Baw Heid"-- Jinbish, Sep 12 2005 In Greek we say: I'll write your name on my balls when we want to express how unimportant someone is.-- BIVIEFIOUS, Sep 13 2005 One I like here is "Schlappschwanz", meaning wimp or wuss but which literally means "limp-dick".-- squeak, Sep 13 2005 My Chinese engineering friends refer to calling someone a "duck" or a "chicken" when suggesting they are seedy-types (suggesting that they sell themselves for sex etc.) No idea why. My IM conversations with them are weird too. Some of the swearing we use translates poorly into Chinese, so they tell me.-- BritUSA, Sep 13 2005 I wouldn't give your two balls for this.-- Susan, Sep 13 2005 [shinobi]'s spelling is right next to my testes. If he doesn't learn how to spell "hilarious" and "uncomfortable", I'm going to reap the rewards of my eyebrow's ventilation all over him. That was my impression of a swearing Polish exchange student.-- quaero curvus, Sep 13 2005 I learned one day in Spain, that, "Do you have eggs?" when translated into Spanish and asked of a male without any preamble means something like, "Do you want to fight me you woman?"-- JesusHChrist, Sep 13 2005 I said "tienes huevos" to him meaning did he have any eggs i could buy, but he thought I mean did he want to fight, "I doubt that you have the balls to fight me."-- JesusHChrist, Sep 14 2005 So, what /do/ you say to a Spanish shopkeeper when you want to make an omelette but also want to avoid personal injury? The likelihood that I'll ever need the phrase is marginal, but I ask out of idle cullinary curiousity.-- coprocephalous, Sep 14 2005 ¿puede I sus cohones en una cesta?-- Susan, Sep 14 2005 this will go well with my inappropriate swelling-- benfrost, Sep 16 2005 I dont know, maybe, "Tienes huevos para comer?" Or maybe its context like, "Hola, tengo hambre, tienes huevos?"-- JesusHChrist, Sep 16 2005 This idea reminds me of the crazy cat lady throwing cats and yelling some uninteligible words (from Simpsons).
I see this as a basic survival strategy .... fight ... flight ... do something crazy or confusing [+]-- ixnaum, Sep 18 2005 Try: "Buenos dias señor. Vende usted huevos?" then mutter "...stupid non english-speaking retard..."-- methinksnot, May 16 2006 random, halfbakery