Have you ever gone shopping and forgotten your list? Have you ever just needed one more thing but couldnt remember what it was? Did your honey say, Please pick me a ***** when you go to the store? If you have any of these problems, just look for the little booth somewhere between the service desk and the restrooms where the In-Store Psychic can help you remember. Just let him/her run their hands over your charge card, checkbook or even a ten-dollar bill freshly removed from your wallet. You will be asked a series of relevant questions, which you must answer honestly for this to work. Then you will eventually be guided to at least the correct department.
Fees are applied individually. If you do not remember what you need, there is no charge for the service.-- xandram, May 01 2007 Supermarket Pirates Supermarket PiratesJust seemed appropriate somehow. [zen_tom, May 02 2007] Rather than play the Harry Potter card and MFD this, I will instead suggest replacing the gypsy circus folk with qualified hypnotists who can help you remember what you may have forgotten.-- marklar, May 01 2007 There really is no magic involved. Psychics do what they do, whether it works for you or not.-- xandram, May 01 2007 //Please pick me a *****// brings home five blank tins joined at the base, each one displaying an asterix. (+) magical-- xenzag, May 01 2007 Perhaps instead the store could lend or rent split hazel twigs. Shoppers could then dowse for the missing item.-- MaxwellBuchanan, May 01 2007 "Clean up...isle sixth"-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, May 01 2007 ...
<crash>-- nuclear hobo, May 02 2007 ummm, good idea [Ian].-- xandram, May 02 2007 <spooky manner> [xandram], I knew you were going to post this.</spooky manner>-- pertinax, May 02 2007 In a world where everyone is trying to sell something, trusting any message becomes quite a dilemma.
There's an advert at the moment (for a chocolate bar) that shows a pretty young lady looking in her fridge for chocolate (it's been scoffed by her absent, naturally chocolate hungry flatmates) she repairs to the bedroom, where hidden under the bed, in a box of girly things, she's got a secret stash of chocolate. "Thank goodness, nobody knows about this place" she tells herself as she snaps off a piece and indulges herself in a stylised piece of sepia-toned secret binging.
The opportunity to be wrenched out of this memory sapping requirement for analysis (whether provided by a wizened crone, or ensuited hypnotist) would be welcome. I went to the shop only the other day, walked about the isles thinking, "What was that one thing I specifically came here to get?" bought some default items, hoping that I might hit the requirement by accident - dragged the whole lot home - and then, as I'm unpacking it, finally remember that I wanted to get some more coffee. [+]-- zen_tom, May 02 2007 //walked about the isles thinking// - was this an archipelago-based supermarket? ("Ah! Deli Island - I'll buy some salami, I think")-- hippo, May 02 2007 Yarr! This was a sea-fairer's supermarket. You turn up at the door and step into your boat which is then piloted around the flooded supermarket. A huge fan provides a constant Nor-Nor-East, propelling you under a good head of wind into the fruit and veg isles, the Gateway to the shop. After you've knocked enough groceries off the shelves and into your boat, you then have to perfect your tacking skills and get back to the tills.-- zen_tom, May 02 2007 //a sea-fairer's supermarket// - were there aquatic dodgems? - or did you mean "seafarer"?-- hippo, May 02 2007 [+] to [zen_tom] for managing to steer the conversation towards piracy.-- marklar, May 02 2007 //or did you mean "seafarer"?// Oh no, it was most definitely a sea-fairer's market. Populated with people who's task in life is to ensure that the sea remains completely impartial in all things, harbouring no favouritism to anyone, and eschewing dogems of all description.-- zen_tom, May 02 2007 \\And yet if you installed a suited-up financial trader in the same position, everybody'd trust that person to somehow know what's about to happen in the future. Funny old world\\
That's not a bad idea in itself. For the people who see the weekly shop as a potential investment.-- hidden truths, May 02 2007 Well, [zen_tom],//" What was that one thing I specifically came here to get?"// was exactly my inspiration for this idea, but I must thank you for getting [marklar]'s vote, as he wanted to mfd at first.-- xandram, May 02 2007 random, halfbakery