Probably more often than is necessary, I show up here drunk off my ass. If this were a job, I'd have been fired long ago for negligence, along with a lot of other shit I'm sure. It occurred to me only today that I could benefit from my love of the whiskey virus, if for no other reason than this place is chock full of potential drinking games.
As happens with all things in life, the HB follows a strict set of patterns, each with its own subset of patterns down to the smallest detail. These patterns are not always obvious, nor are they always predictable, but they are always inevitable. It is inevitable that someone will post a "convert gyms into power plants" idea. It is inevitable that a certain item/catchphrase/foodstuff will become the latest craze. It is inevitable that formerly prolific bakers will come back, no matter how long the absence (except for a few, I guess. Where's zippyanna?). It is inevitable, therefore, that someone will find a way to make use of these inevitabilities.
Manifest destiny, I suppose.

The Halfbakery Drinking Game. Bask in its completely insipid splendor as I reveal a few rules to you. Don't worry, I'll be gentle.

Every time a n00b accuses the contingent of being unfair, harsh, or otherwise hateful, take a drink.

If a troll posts something ridiculous and gets a big initial reaction before finally being ignored, drink up.

Whenever [UnaBubba] parodies a song in Halfbakery form, take a drink.

Anytime you read something that makes a fluid come out of any orifice on your body, bottoms up, ese.

Whenever [AfroAssault] tries to sound smart but winds up carelessly meandering through the english language, take a drink (that means now).

If [po] posts an idea that is so bizarre and wonderful that you have to think about it for a minute, take a drink.

Whenever you look at the clock and say "Fuck, I really need to log off," then look at another idea or two, tip that shit back and drink again.

If this idea is already posted, anno it "baked." Oh, and drink up.

If you found a link for this idea, take a drink.

If you've ever spoken to another baker over the phone, drink right now. NOW GODDAMMIT.

Any time someone looks over your shoulder and either reads the title of an idea out loud or says "what are you reading?" DRINK!

If you actually read this far and agree with the rules, oh you better believe that's a drink.

Whenever you see [mfd].... look over there! What's that? Oh, it's a TAKE A DRINK.

Any idea that [jutta] posts on is worth a drink. If she [mfd]'s it, that's two.

So, [bristolz] illustrated that idea, huh? Well, illustrate yourself taking a drink. Yeah, that was pretty stupid, sorry.

If [farmerjohn] posts another clock idea, take as many drinks as there are hours past 12:00 according to your clock. If it's 11:00 PM and you're on military time, call an ambulance first.

If the [Halfbakery] category shows up on your overview, yes indeed that's a drink.

Feel free to add you own rules. If you do, take a drink afterwards. It's your duty as a member of an obscure 80s pop band.
-- AfroAssault, Apr 13 2005

Obscure 80's pop band http://80music.abou.../od/theloverspeaks/
Never 'eard of 'em mesself.

<takes a drink>
[DrBob, Apr 13 2005]

<spills a drink> http://www.guardian...604,1043501,00.html
[skinflaps, Apr 13 2005]

Holy shit, new rule:
If it gets a fishbone within 10 seconds of being posted, drink up. Guess I'll be on the couch tomorrow morning.

Edit 8 seconds later - And a fucking bun?! Where are these votes coming from?
-- AfroAssault, Apr 13 2005


If you think Afro's wasted, take a drink.
-- david_scothern, Apr 13 2005


Nosh sho neuw in mn'my booksh <swig> wasshed sthe diea againsh?*8 <swig> ShSA..i;m doign ishh agairrn!!

<swig>

Sfrromm shish ishh WHAT"£? OuCH!!** SHEEZZ fUkee8n fallshen Oversh!! PfZZzzZ../.
-- skinflaps, Apr 13 2005


Well it's a little early...but that's what I get for checking this place out before work.
Cheers.
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Apr 13 2005


Come back from refilling your drink & anno the current idea with your thoughts on the one you've read a couple of ideas back. That's gotta be a drink.
-- Zimmy, Apr 13 2005


If your contact lenses start to feel like a million tiny knives in your eyes because you've been reading the ideas and annos without blinking, drink up.
-- Machiavelli, Apr 13 2005


Drink if you were drunk when you read this post.

<<<drink>>>
-- Blumster, Apr 13 2005


Take a drink if you're posting while drinking....then edit your post.......then delete your post.

Then take another drink.
-- normzone, Apr 13 2005


You were in an obscure pop band in the 80's? no wonder you've turned to the bottle
-- benfrost, Apr 13 2005


....resists urge to link to web site specializing in big nips.....
-- normzone, Apr 14 2005


If you find an idea that covers more than two screens (not counting annos) that was *not* written by [Vernon], take a drink. Conversely, if you find a post shorter than one screen and written by [Vernon], take a drink. (this current idea warrants a drink)
-- 5th Earth, Apr 14 2005


With my one glass of red a day, I surely lose.
-- FarmerJohn, Apr 14 2005


Does water count? I figure eventually I’ll get a buzz from electrolyte imbalance.
-- Shz, Apr 14 2005


Take a drink whenever you're *not* drunk while posting. (Which would leave sflaps and me, really, really bored, and feeling left out.)
-- blissmiss, Apr 14 2005


If you press refresh on the rcent screen more than once in the span of ten seconds...

Drink!

If you don't have any idea's but find yourself staring at the wall waiting for the next big fish and wasting valuable hours at your workplace...

Drink!
-- daseva, Apr 14 2005


Every time you see an idea for a tracking device that could be "1984ized" by an unchecked government, take a drink.
-- disbomber, Apr 14 2005


Adreforde bultilize. Conmanfronna GITZ! horseradish DSL my dusty books! Firewall my freezer.
-- Zimmy, Apr 16 2005


Whenever you read an annotation with the phrase "take a drink" in it, take a drink, and then read the annotation again -- and then take as many drinks as there are "take a drink"s, in the annotation. And then take as many drinks as times you can remember having read the phrase "take a drink" in this idea.
-- JesusHChrist, Apr 16 2005


Zimny, and hear I was thinking you were a toe teetler. you an yer dersyt walls and...zzzer's/

Ok, enough drunk speak, fore jutta slaps us all sideways. (Reminds me of my ma, and with 6 little asshole kids, and very little time, she would line us up, and smack us straight down the row. Biggest, to smallest. I always got the lightest smack, cause her hand hurt fer she got to me.)

Could happen ya know.
-- blissmiss, Apr 16 2005


Every time someone mentions an RFID idea (annos count), usually helping the blind see, curing leprosy/cancer/AIDS, providing more sports stats, etc., take a drink. Hell, take a damn handle.
-- disbomber, Apr 17 2005


Every time someone makes a joke about [AfroAssault]'s drunkenness, take a drink.
-- disbomber, Apr 17 2005


Sounds like a fun game except one thing

"Anytime you read something that makes a fluid come out of any orifice on your body, bottoms up, ese."

Thinking programatically that could become a never ending loop under the right conditions
-- nustada, Oct 26 2006


If your on the HB at 4 in the morning 'cause you can't wait to see what the crew from England has to say ...
-- MikeD, Jul 14 2009


Seems to be an eternity to wait for a drink. A bloke could dehydrate between takes.
-- Ah Supp, Oct 08 2011



random, halfbakery