Business: Store
Ex-Key-Labar   (+1)  [vote for, against]
You know...for keys.

Recent financial success (by blatantly ignoring HB honour principles and [Vernon]'s SPARLVE (whatever)) has led to a rather unfortunate conundrum.
In days of yore, you would always find me at the back break (waves, you must understand, not actual physical labour, godforbid), keys to my mode of transport firmly ensconced in the back pocket of my swimshorts, hair halfway down my back, next meal firmly set in someone else's budget.

Nowadays I find my meals firmly set halfway down my front, hair approaching the back pocket of my swimshorts (from the front, you must understand), and my dividends trying desperately to find a home in someone else's budget.

One thing I would like to keep pure is bobbing on the back line. One of the most unfortunate requirements of "key" member insurance (it IS a bad joke) is that I drive a mobile airbag around. Most mobile airbags seem to be driven, not only by overtly powerful engines, nor the fact that they can tow Unimogs up K2's west face, nor the fact that they can do a 1/4 mile in under 3 sec whilst emitting a vibration that renders everything above an estroginistas knees available, but also by some Magick ignition key. Gone are the days of pressed and cut metal. No, no, you need the latest in RF technology. Needless to say this system, and method, does not lend itself to a regular and prolonged dousing in the waters of the Indian Ocean. The world being what it is, more specifically at the Durban beachfront, it is highly unlikely that I will secret my RF Magick token within the folds of my suitably unfashionable, and unobserved, Kikoi. Nor, I hazard a guess, is it suitable for my likewise overworked plowers of nature's wave harvest.

What we need is a decent key supp, err, repository. For a nominal fee Ex-Key-Labar will cement a relationship with your ignition key. Using the wonders of vacuum gripping <see link #1> and small enough beads <see link #2> you will insert your key into a slot with a suitably rock-shaped look and feel. The courteous and Merlin-esque attendant will take a time-stamped photograph, attributable to that slot, and that slot only, take your deposit and send you on your merry sojourn.

The rest, as they say, is his story. Batteries not included, definitely contains nuts.
-- 4whom, Apr 21 2011

Vacuum gripping http://robotstockne...obotic-hand-co.html
[4whom, Apr 21 2011]

microbeads http://www.glass-sp.../en/microbeads.html
[4whom, Apr 21 2011]

Surf's up...
-- normzone, Apr 21 2011


To save anyone else who wants to be saved from having to read that while wondering what the idea is, the idea seems to consist of storing one's car key in one's rectum.
-- notexactly, Feb 10 2016


Wow. My anno stood alone for nearly five years. I bet it's glad for the company.
-- normzone, Feb 10 2016



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