An ImaginIndustries elevator speaker doesn't play muzak. Instead, each time the doors close and the elevator begins to move, it announces a random fact in an authoritative, quiz-masterly voice.
As the passengers respond to the fact with, "Well, well," "Fancy that," and other such murmurings, the awkward silence so often a part of an elevator ride is dissipated, and they can share the rest of the journey in a warm, comradely silence, as they stand there, mulling over the random fact with which they have just been presented.-- imaginality, Mar 19 2008 Wholly Baked http://www.captivate.com/index.html...just without the announcements.News, weather and totally meaningless trivia. And I'm afraid the mutterings of "Fuck me!" and "I'll be buggered!" just draw sullen stares from the people who can't see the screen. [DrCurry, Mar 19 2008] And who is to say what constitutes a fact? Sounds like a propaganda machine to me, captive audience, no capacity for feedback.-- nuclear hobo, Mar 19 2008 It could intersperse actual facts with dubious facts, to seed discussion amongst passengers.-- Texticle, Mar 19 2008 Themed questions and 'true or false' mode (the elevator reveals the answer when it slows to a halt) are both features of the delux model.
[nuclear hobo], the random facts we use for our elevator speakers are guaranteed to be as value-neutral as random facts get, though if you are the elevator speaker purchaser for a dictatorship, corporation or cult, we're certainly happy to discuss your specific needs and flavour our facts accordingly.-- imaginality, Mar 19 2008 The elevator should ask pop quiz questions that have one of the numbers on the elevator buttons as an answer. (The switch from elevator mode to quiz mode could be indicated by a quick run-through of all the buttons.) Doors open as soon as someone picks the right answer...-- jutta, Mar 19 2008 2841mph???
Glad I gave it a miss when I was there.-- wagster, Mar 19 2008 Yah - if that elevator goes 2841 mph I think we might have a reusable resource to complete the N-prize...
We just need to make sure we get off after we put the tiny satellite in it and push the button, or something...-- globaltourniquet, Mar 19 2008 //"In the event of failure, the farthest this elevator can fall is 150 metres, with a terminal velocity of 80 kilometres per hour."//
[+]LOL! I love it!-- Jscotty, Mar 19 2008 "Incidents involving elevators and escalators kill about 30 and seriously injure about 17,100 people each year in the United States, according to data provided by the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics and the Consumer Product Safety Commission. Injuries to people working on or near elevators – including those installing, repairing, and maintaining elevators, and working in or near elevator shafts – account for 14- 15 (almost half) of the deaths. The two major causes of death are falls and being caught in/between moving parts of elevators/escalators. Incidents where workers are in or on elevators or platforms that collapse, are struck by elevators or counterweights, or are electrocuted are also numerous."-- jaksplat, Mar 19 2008 //The Stratosphere Tower elevator, in Las Vegas, Nevada, does 2500fpm or 2841mph.//
Mach 3.69, better bring ear plugs. That will get you to the 869' high observation deck in .06 milliseconds. Of course each elevator will be equipped with fuildized acceleration / deceleration couches in an attempt to keep passenegers from bing flattened into pancakes by excessive G forces.-- nuclear hobo, Mar 19 2008 "If you think the fastest sea creature is the shark, press 1. For the dolphin, press 2. For the tuna, press 3. For the flying fish, press 4." etc. etc.-- 8th of 7, Mar 19 2008 ".. For the humpback whale, press 167." <looks at watch, taps foot...> "For the sailfish, press 168." <exasperated>"Finally!"</e>-- neutrinos_shadow, Mar 19 2008 Ah, but do you know what the fastest biscuit in the world is?
Scone.-- imaginality, Mar 19 2008 I rode the elevators at the Stratosphere recently, and they take considerably longer than the SkyJump (which I also did), which takes 17 seconds (IIRC) from jumping from the top to landing at the bottom.-- notexactly, Apr 16 2018 random, halfbakery