Elephants love sweets. They'll eat anything sweet, provided they can find it. And they spew it out half-digested, and that is where this idea gets to work.
Thick rope. Boiled in molasses. You bring in lots and lots, a great length of it, and let the end trail conspicuously on the ground where those darn elephants are known to wander. And sit back and wait.
Pretty soon a great big herd of them descendants of mammoths come tripping along and the one of them that has the priority rights seizes the end of the rope and starts munching along. He's in a great haste because it's sweet and he only half-munches it and so it only gets half digested and pretty soon he is passing out rope which is half sweet.
The next one in line catches hold of this end and he starts on it and so it repeats, the whole herd of them getting strung up on that great big peace of rope.
So you just ketch the other end and toss the lot over yore sholder and off yu go wid a string of ELEPHANTS.-- neelandan, Dec 06 2003 Elephant incidence from November. I am sure these things average themselves out! http://www.halfbake...ut_21:t=Elephant_20Please edit to check back through the archives [gnomethang, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004] (?) discussion of elephant digestive system http://www.freeessays.cc/db/3/alw0.shtml [engineer1, Oct 05 2004] Tilly hat rope http://www.brandson...m/testimonials.html [normzone, Apr 13 2011] (?) I like this idea. It reminds me of elephants. http://www.youtube....3v_oKU&noredirect=1 [bungston, Nov 18 2013] Bow before neelandan.-- thumbwax, Dec 06 2003 Hmmm ! Great idea for Catholics ! Worry beads for the seriously visually impaired devotee !!!-- VladTheImpaler, Dec 06 2003 <from Dumbo>I could stand the sight of worms And look at microscopic germs But stringing together pachyderms Is really too much for me I am not the type to faint When things are odd or things are quaint But seeing things you know that ain't Can certainly give you an awful fright! What a sight! Chase 'em away! Chase 'em away! I'm afraid need your aid Stringed elephants on parade! Stringed elephants! Stringed elephants!-- RayfordSteele, Dec 06 2003 [As seen on coffee cup]: "Unless you're the lead elephant, the taste never changes..."-- Overpanic, Dec 06 2003 Were I to be struck dead right now, my only regret would be not complimenting [Ray] on his song in my last annotation.-- Overpanic, Dec 06 2003 Hup 2, 3, 4 Keep it up 2, 3, 4 Company sound off!
Oh, the aim of our patrol Is a question rather droll For to march and drill over field and hill Is a military goal! Is a military goal!
Hup 2, 3, 4 Dress it up 2, 3, 4 Hup 2, 3, 4 Dress it up 2, 3, 4
By the ranks or single file Over every jungle mile Oh we stamp and crush Through the underbrush In a military style! In a military style!
Hup 2, 3, 4 Keep it up 2, 3, 4-- po, Dec 06 2003 Now that you've got your elephants strung, it's time to hang them on the tree. Carefully, (you don't want to break them), start at the top of your tree and work your way around it in a zig zag pattern setting an elephant gently on each bow.-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Dec 06 2003 Hasn't this been done with geese and suet-on-a-string?-- Guncrazy, Dec 06 2003 Is this just my opinion or do others think it is kind of strange that there has been 2 things having to do with elephants in the past few days poseted here?-- JCL2004, Dec 06 2003 only 2? that is peculiar..-- po, Dec 06 2003 I think that these things just average themselves out. Link above for you [JCL2004] to check elephant stats to your heart's content.-- gnomethang, Dec 06 2003 you gonna make me look like a twerp when it comes up with 1 elephant idea in the last year!-- po, Dec 06 2003 Careful not to get 'em tangled up. That would be an aweful mess to untie.
I saw a veggie stand Heard an ole boy band I saw a toilet that did run dry But I think I will have seen everything When I see an elephant tie.
I saw a power swing heard a carriage sing I witnessed gravity wave goodbye But I think I will have seen everything When I see an elephant tie.
I've been to auctions to trade in my luck And they tell me that a man made a bicycle truck I didn't see that, it sounds quite absurd But just to be sociable I'll take your word
I've heard of Terry Pratchett Used a keister ratchet And it torqued 'til I thought I'd cry But I'd been done seen about everything when I see an elephant tie.-- RayfordSteele, Dec 07 2003 Extra credit if you can figure out how to get two elephants back-to-back on a rope.-- AO, Dec 08 2003 i don't think it would taste vary sweet after the the first elephant...
you know if the right people found out about this you could get in alot of trouble ;)-- i-Mer, Dec 08 2003 You've just made sense of the "other:[general]" category, [neelandan]. Didn't think that was possible.-- k_sra, Dec 09 2003 This same idea would make a cute frog necklace. I'm not sure my wife would appreciate it though. Does anyone know where to buy fly flavored string?-- Worldgineer, Dec 09 2003 [Worldengineer] No. The same idea wouldn't make a cute frog necklace. Maybe you misheard. [neelanden] said ELEPHANTS!-- squeak, Dec 09 2003 Try the fly fishing aisle in your local bait and tackle?-- RayfordSteele, Dec 09 2003 The frogs would be dead and quite smelly because their guts would be damaged. And yes, the rope would not be sweet - fiberous mateirial is hard to digest but molasas is not!-- my-nep, Dec 09 2003 Easier to hold onto in the shower.-- waugsqueke, Dec 09 2003 ...or very small elephants.-- krelnik, Dec 09 2003 How do you tell when there’s an elephant in your shower?-- AO, Dec 09 2003 I don't know, [AO], how do you tell when there's an elephant in your shower?</playing along>-- Worldgineer, Dec 09 2003 It's written on your toe tag?-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Dec 09 2003 All the empty shampoo bottles. </scrambling for a punch line to a poorly planned joke.>-- AO, Dec 09 2003 //How do you tell if theres an elephant in your shower?//
Possible Q's: I've looked under the bed and in the cupboard where else could it be?
There are footprints in the toothpaste?
um I give up.-- rumbletumbler, Dec 09 2003 Time to get a new elephant?-- Face, Dec 10 2003 Is this painful to the elephants at all?-- The Kat, Dec 10 2003 If elephants sometimes cower in your cold and mouldy shower be not down of heart. Just only hope they dont slip on the soap and tear the floor apart.
It could be worse you know, they could be all in tow, elephants on a rope, on the soap, i will mope, i cant cope, ive lost hope, in the shower.
and yes my poetry really needs help, but what can I do since i lost that right hand in 'nam.-- rumbletumbler, Dec 10 2003 MOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!-- spacecadet, Dec 10 2003 Oh the domino effect, hehehe, thud thud thud...-- thelambs, Dec 10 2003 Last night I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I'll never know...-- fullybaked, Jan 07 2004 What goes on under the covers is NONE of my business, but it seems as though you're MAKING it my business ... I certainly hope its dead.-- Letsbuildafort, Jan 07 2004 That is just disturbing. In any case, what the hell would you do with a string of elephants?-- whatastrangeperson, Mar 08 2004 find an enormous conker to put on the end of it.-- etherman, May 10 2004 ?
You have been reading too much Douglas Adams/Terry Pratchett.
Their weirdness has invaded your brain.
I love it.
What is the application of Elephants-on-a-rope?
If anyone knows,please tell.-- DesertFox, May 20 2004 It helps keep them in line.-- Worldgineer, May 20 2004 Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!
I understand.
Why do we want them in a line though?
What if we want a series of branching circuits instead?-- DesertFox, May 20 2004 Branches are not a problem. Circuits are, unless you tie knots.-- Worldgineer, May 20 2004 I'd like to take a scientific approach here: The first elehpant enjoys a sweet rope. The second elephant have to compromise on a half sweet rope. The third elephant will leave behind him a rope half as sweet as the rope he ate - a 0.25 sweet rope. [...and so on...] The k's elephant will face a 1/(2^(k-1)) sweet rope. Will the rope get eaten?
Assuming that an elephant will not eat things that are less than X sweet (where X is a fraction between 0 and 1), we can only get 1-log2(X) elephants per rope - not neccesarily the whole herd as promised.-- shibolim, May 20 2004 Thaumatin is about 2,000x as sweet as sugar on a weight basis and around 100,000x as sweet on a mole basis. That should increase your herd size some. Or you could re-apply between elephants.-- Worldgineer, May 20 2004 Well [World], if you're going to change the rules, could we at least wash the rope and reapply sweet between elephants, that takes some of the yucky out of it for me. +-- dentworth, May 20 2004 //I'd like to take a scientific approach here//
If you want to get "scientific" then you also have to ask whether an elephant will eat a rope covered in shit, no matter how sweet. You must ask how long the guts of an elephant actually are and therefore how much rope is required, and whether elephants have a gagging or negative reaction to something stuck down their throats for long periods of time.-- k_sra, May 20 2004 What if we can find another species, that only eat ropes that are LESS than X sweet? and pass out ropes TWICE as sweet as given?
Then we would get an alternating chain of elepant-(other species), limited only by the length of the rope, as mentioned above.-- shibolim, May 20 2004 How do you stop an elephant from getting through the keyhole? Tie a knot in its tail. Or, in this case, tie a knot in all the other elephants. Would thinner, but stronger, rope be less painful for the participating pachyderms, or more so? ( apologies,as always, for the above alliteration)-- blueturtle, Jun 03 2004 if the rope would be half digested by each elephant out of the total he munches, can anyone calculate, how many metres of rope and how much sweet would be required to gather 10 elephants ? assume certain minimum sweetness index to attract the elephant.-- vedarshi, Jun 03 2004 [Pocket], maybe there's a kinder way of saying so? I agree that I no immediate plans to head to Kenya with a rope, brush and bucket of molasses, but I still appreciate a good laugh first thing in the morning.-- FloridaManatee, Jun 03 2004 vedarshi time for me to do some maths, where can i find details of the length of an elephants alimentary canal?
1/2 hour later and i find the length from the stomach back is 116' = 35.35 m-- engineer1, Jun 04 2004 [engineer1] your question is irrelevant. you have to assume that half of the rope is digested by the elephant. it would be the same in all cases-whether alimentary canal is 10 metre long or 50 metre long or it is a baby elephant or 60 years old elephant.i hope your calculation would be much easier now.-- vedarshi, Jun 04 2004 the problem now is that the first elephant on the rope would digest the rope so you could only ever get 1 on a rope-- engineer1, Jun 04 2004 S/he said half a rope. That makes two per rope.-- Worldgineer, Jun 04 2004 Getting elephants back to back on the rope: have two elephants eat both ends of the rope. tie a knot to make a full circle. Then, yank on the circle so that the know passes through one of the elephants (he's not going to be happy about this) and ends up between their two mouths. Untie the knot and you have 'em ass to ass... can we have more than one rope go through? Think of the complex networks of elephants then!-- daseva, Jun 04 2004 After the first few elephants I suspect that the rope would be less sweet.
In fact unless elephants digestive tracts are unique, I suspect getting even a single second elephant to join in would require either drugs or a very hungry elephant.-- macrumpton, Jun 04 2004 [FloridaManatee] I've had several GOOD ideas absolutely trashed by these same people. So, when they think something this dumb is a good idea, I'm quite entitled to voice my opinion. And, am I wrong, or is the point of this site to come up with smart, intelligent, useful inventions/innovations? Yeah...elephants on a rope will come in handy SOOOO often. Give me a break.-- Pocketassreturn, Jun 04 2004 [attention : all frustrated guys ] even many of my GOOD ideas have been trashed, not even voted for. you can verify the validity of my statement by clicking on Search, typing vedarshi & clicking on Go. don't get frustrated. i'd like to reproduce a quote "Every truth passes through thrre stages- first, it is ridiculed; second, it is violently resisted and third,it is accepted as an obvious reality". i repeat don't get disheartened.-- vedarshi, Jun 04 2004 [neelandan] i like to visit this page at least once daily simply because the more i imagine about the situation, the more it makes me laugh & feel light. comments from all bakers are also appreciable. just one curiosity, how it came about in your mind ?-- vedarshi, Jun 05 2004 Old folklore translation? Drunk comrade's story? Analogy of stringing up fish? Whatever.-- neelandan, Jun 07 2004 true world, but for this idea to be any use th elephants would have to be nose to tail.-- engineer1, Jun 07 2004 Seems trunk to trunk would work fine as well. Doesn't matter - it would still be two on a rope.-- Worldgineer, Jun 07 2004 trunk to tail you could link them up like a train.-- engineer1, Jun 07 2004 Trunk to trunk you can lead them around in pairs. Where are we going with this?-- Worldgineer, Jun 07 2004 Who knows? I wouldn't be contemplating this so hard if i actually had anything to do today-- engineer1, Jun 07 2004 //only gets half digested and pretty soon he is passing out rope which is half sweet.//
Would this rope be subject to xeno's paradox? Would each elephant only digest half of the sweetness of the rope, making the rope infinitely sweet?
//How do you tell if theres an elephant in your shower?//
Easy: "Hey, there's an elephant in my shower."-- cuckoointherye, Jan 26 2005 I have this image of two herds of elephants meeting in the middle of the rope, each herd having started at one end. "What now guys?"-- wagster, Jan 26 2005 A really dangerous tug of war?-- cuckoointherye, Jan 26 2005 Would they just slide off again?-- wagster, Jan 26 2005 if the rope was a tube, than the sweet flavor could be continuously injected and allowed to soak through to the outside. therefore it's always sweet. therefore limitless elephants.-- RBStimers, Mar 22 2005 This is still my favourite halfbaked idea. The answer to the age old question "How do you floss an elephant?". I'm glad I got to vote for it a second time. Makes a man proud to be a halfbaker.Good times.-- energy guy, Apr 20 2005 with cats you just need a loong piece of tinsel.
[+]-- FlyingToaster, Oct 21 2009 Decorating for xmas a little early this year? (wonders if xmas tree branches could support a string of kittens)-- Worldgineer, Oct 21 2009 A rope having only two elephants could serve as bolas useful for hunting other elephants or other animals considered suitable for use on a rope (such as moles, right, Worldgineer?).-- luxlucet, Oct 22 2009 First one is a Tilly hat testament on elephant gustatory habits. (link)-- normzone, Apr 13 2011 [lux] Man that was a hard reference to figure out. Did you think I'd remember what I typed 7 years ago? (to be fair, that's 5 years ago to you - time really flies around here)
[norm] eew.-- Worldgineer, Apr 20 2011 Rope lights... It is very strange that a huge animal like this is practically invisible when walking down the road. Rope lights would be useful, though maybe the power source would need to use methane.-- Ling, Apr 20 2011 //How do you tell if theres an elephant in your shower?// Instead of sham-poo there's real poo.
It's worth contemplating omitting the rope and simply coating their trunks and tails with molasses. Contemplating... contemplating... OK, I'm done now.-- spidermother, Apr 23 2011 Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like an over ripe banana.-- neelandan, Apr 23 2011 you can use fishing line or nylong string and place bits of food on it, a lot of animals like birds will eat the food and swallow the line whole, then when you see them they are unable to escape.
It's used in trapping.-- metarinka, Apr 25 2011 Ever seen the movie The Human Centipede? I haven't.-- rcarty, Apr 25 2011 I haven't, I hear it's memorable.-- FlyingToaster, Apr 25 2011 Then this idea would have been the elephant centipede.-- neelandan, Nov 18 2013 Yeah, gross. I still haven't seen it, but probably heard someone tell me about it half a dozen times.
But in theory using this method, if the string was absorbent enough, or rope, it would potentially carry nutrients (and excrement) to the next elephant, or person, in the series.-- rcarty, Nov 18 2013 //Extra credit if you can figure out how to get two elephants back-to-back on a rope.//
Get one elephant to swallow the rope. Then get the other elephant to swallow the first one whole.-- RayfordSteele, Nov 18 2013 random, halfbakery