Okay, my apologies in advance to those who aren't used to waking up to the smell of alfalfa with the milk removed.

It's pretty well documented that cows like music. Playing music to cows results in better growth, more milk production, and a calmer disposition. This can be very important on those winter mornings when the heifers come into the milking barn with their tails frozen solid and their moods in a knot...

Cows are musical creatures. They vocalize to each other; they have a very wide range of expression. From contented lowing, through a gently reminding moo, to an outraged bellow - cows are seldom lacking in communicating their needs to their keepers. And a cow in full voice, while not likely to shatter a wine glass, can certainly send ripples across the windshield of your tractor from three furlongs off.

Too many insensitive people think "music for cows" is just "country music". This couldn't be more wrong. Country music often glamorizes roping, branding, harassment, imprisonment and mutilation of cows. They are really sweet, sensitive individuals who don't willingly go for such things.

So throw down the guitar and let's find some music a cow can appreciate. Probably something with pipe organs. Synthesized shallow glissandos and rounded vowels. Consonants designed for a bovine's limitations, and crescendos tailored to their strengths.

It might not sound too musical to us. But to them - well, we can only wait to hear what they say.
-- lurch, Aug 08 2003

Henry Cow http://www.allmusic...9&sql=B58q8g4jttv2z
[thumbwax, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 06 2004]

cow yoke http://www.kountryl...om/content/fi14.htm
[beauxeault, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 06 2004]

The Singing Cow http://www.urban75.com/Mag/cow.html
[Amos Kito, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 06 2004]

Music for cows http://news.bbc.co....ci/tech/1408434.stm
[sufc, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 06 2004]

I'm a Cow http://members.iinet.net.au/~afleay/cow/
A Flash Animation. (Rated PG-13) [Cedar Park, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 06 2004]

I am cow. http://www.angelfir...ntWorms/IAmCow.html
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 06 2004]

[In anticipation of innumerable cow puns...]
-- Detly, Aug 08 2003


"Udder nonsense."

There. I said it.
-- Cedar Park, Aug 08 2003


Will you have different moosic for different mooods?
Sooothing, melodic moosic whilst milking,
Faster, rhythmic moosic whist chewing the cud
and Beefed up, jazz whilst in the bulls pen.
-- silverstormer, Aug 08 2003


// let's find some music a cow can appreciate. //

I thought that's what Barry Manilow was doing all this time.
-- waugsqueke, Aug 08 2003


C'mon, [waugs], cows do have *some* taste.
-- angel, Aug 08 2003


//well, we can only wait to hear what they say.//

I think I could make a pretty good guess. Starts with "m"...
-- lostdog, Aug 08 2003


I imagine something like a gregorian chant, but all tubas and contrabassoons.
-- bungston, Aug 08 2003


[Amos Kito] That link was truly Godawful. Well Found!.
-- gnomethang, Aug 08 2003


Moozart?
-- sufc, Aug 09 2003


Moosorgsky.
-- DeathNinja, Aug 09 2003


I'll whip something up for them on my Holstein-way. Until then, enjoy the [link].
-- Cedar Park, Aug 09 2003



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