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Chicken lawn mower   (+8, -1)  [vote for, against]
Lawn cut by modified chicken

Chicken, when left on lawn, destroy it very fast, because they hammer their beaks to the soil and eat the grass with the roots.

I suggest an attachment to chickens' head (collar) or beaks (superglued), that would stop the beak exactly 1 inch above the ground. Result - lawn mowed perfectly and for free.
-- slovakmartin, Jun 01 2015

Your main problem https://www.youtube...watch?v=uprNNH8Oxog
creating inadvertent zombies [4and20, Jun 02 2015]

Chicken coop https://www.youtube...watch?v=3xBiSp6rQM0
Movable coops keep the burn down a bit [popbottle, Jun 02 2015]

This is almost certainly the best chicken-based idea I have ever seen on this site.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 01 2015


This is certainly the best chicken-based idea I have seen on this page.
-- normzone, Jun 01 2015


This advanced chicken technology is reminiscent of old lawn-mowing technology, which involved very skilled gentlemen with scythes. The height of the cut was set by having them wear built-up shoes.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 01 2015


As everybody knows, if you draw a straight line, a chicken will follow it, head down. Could we draw several lines in parallel, or would that be crossing the line?
-- 4and20, Jun 02 2015


Your lawn must look atrociously unmown if you think 1" is short enough.
-- pocmloc, Jun 02 2015


You're right, 1'' is too much. It could be made adjustable easily. Simply cut a thread to the beak and screw a 1'' pipe with a nut glued inside :) Adjustable by turning clockwise/ccw.
-- slovakmartin, Jun 02 2015


yeah but the chickens are eating bugs as well. So, a vacuum or blower arrangement to bring the bugs up to where they can be beaked.
-- FlyingToaster, Jun 02 2015


I'm not boning because of cruelty to animals, ""ha ha! let's torture things!"

I'm boning because it wouldn't work. Chickens destroy lawns because they're digging for food. There's no chicken food an inch (much too short, you'll kill your grass) above the ground.
-- Voice, Jun 02 2015


But the chickens don't know that.

You could always use ostriches. They graze (given the chance), but they have what amounts to a "lip" on their beak which is about an inch long, so they would naturally crop the grass to about that length.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 02 2015


Whilst I love the title, a chicken lawn mower would seem to be something more mechanical. Maybe a bunch of chickens belted onto a skateboard that could be pushed around the lawn when you weren't skateboarding? Otherwise, this idea should be *Chicken Mowed Lawn*. bun pending
-- xandram, Jun 04 2015


Incidentally, two of the major manufacturers of industrial lawnmowers (as used on football pitches, for instance) test their machines by throwing [dead] chickens into the blades.

I know what you're going to say - that I'm thinking of jet engines. But that would be ridiculous; designing a lawnmower to survive having a jet engine thrown into it would be overkill.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 07 2015


What about jet-powered lawnmowers? I suppose we should really call them gas turbine mowers.
-- pocmloc, Jun 07 2015


I think the problem there would be that, depending on the orientation of the cutting blades, the machine would either suck itself onto your lawn with several thousand pounds of force, or reach 30,000 feet.
-- MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 07 2015


Wouldn't you just have to "declaw" them so that they couldn't scratch?
-- Kumawktopus, Jun 09 2015



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