My house is currently a building site, and when I nearly pulled half of the house down on top of my head yesterday I was left wondering how long it would take for someone to find me crumpled under the rubble which used to be an antique Victorian ceiling.
Should I bang loudly to alert the neighbours to my predicament? Nope; I'd already visited my new neighbours to apologise for the prospect of several days of banging. They'd already promised to turn a deaf ear. I could shout for help, but I'd been shouting all day.
Because building sites are dangerous and noisy, all professional builders should be issued with an alarm (like a rape alarm) which plays a universally agreed tune to alert others to their plight.
"Quick, do you hear the theme from M*A*S*H? I think Bob's in trouble!"
These alarms should be available in hardware stores around the world.-- Fishrat, Mar 11 2004 Super Pass Alarm http://www.galls.co...ort=general_catalogPERFECT choice. [Letsbuildafort, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004] <Shaky>"...This old house is gettin' shaky This old house is gettin' old"</Shaky>-- hippo, Mar 11 2004 Hm. Given that the theme song from M*A*S*H was "Suicide is Painless" I don't think it's really appropriate.-- cpt kangarooski, Mar 11 2004 Bob, the builder? he can do it!-- po, Mar 11 2004 Right Said Fred by Bernard Cribbins (that there wall is gonna have to go)-- unclepete, Mar 11 2004 OK Kangarooski, it's a fair point. I'll change it to Toadinnov's beatles suggestion instead. Also, I'll add an elasticated strap for ease of use.-- Fishrat, Mar 11 2004 Walls come tumbling down by The Style Council.-- sufc, Mar 11 2004 Good idea. Assuming you're still able to press the button from under a ton of rubble.
[Hippo] You've brought back many strange memories.
<Stands up> Hello. My name is squeak and...and..I used to fancy Shakin' Stevens. <sympathetic applause>-- squeak, Mar 11 2004 You'd have to make it of the right sound and volume to be heard through a pile of what may well be very good acoustically insulating material; but not so loud you deafen the hapless builder. +-- Detly, Mar 11 2004 [squeak] My girlfriend recently tried to get an interview with "Shakey" but apparently he's still busy touring. Hope springs eternal.
On topic, how about goes off automatically on impact?-- Fishrat, Mar 11 2004 I though this was going to be in case they couldn't think of anything tuneless to whistle. Incessantly.-- English Bob, Mar 11 2004 The Super Pass alarms used by firefighters would be GREAT - except playing a catchy tune instead of just wailing. With <link>.-- Letsbuildafort, Mar 11 2004 That Super Pass needs a pre-warning before it goes off. Otherwise, if you take a nap you get a nasty wake-up call.-- kbecker, Mar 11 2004 Exactly. It gives the "stop slacking" speech FOR you! Or if you just lay down for a nap, turn it off.-- Letsbuildafort, Mar 12 2004 If you use something that people like to hear, they may not mind hearing again and again (leaving you to rot). I think you need to pull some tunes from the "all time worst" list so that persons nearby would find you to ask "Would you *please* turn that (mess) off?" Either that or we need a public education campaign "...if you hear this music near a construction site, please see if they need medical assistance" I nominate "Achy Breaky Heart" -- a disliked song that (vaguely) indicates a problem of some sort.-- RooneDitoff, Mar 12 2004 Things I have learned: Leave when the builders do; Open the door for the builders tomorrow.Alto Stratus: "New Buildings Falling Down" (with a siren added)-- dpsyplc, Mar 12 2004 Of course, you could have the "fatal building collision song" for really serious situations.-- Fishrat, Mar 13 2004 Surely anything by Die Einsturzende Neubauten would suffice?-- gnomethang, Mar 13 2004 random, halfbakery