He: Hiya Dimple Cheeks! Wanna try some of this new Maple Honey Smoothie?
She: Yeah, umm good stuff. Now, can you see what’s new with me?
He: You’re chewing some new, extra-big wad of gum?
She: No, these’re two rubber pumps I’m chompin’ on that’re part of the extra dimension to my appearance.
He: Then that’s not a dribble of drool exiting the corner of your mouth?
She: No, silly. This is the shiny, transparent, air tube made to look like an attractive trickle. Look down lower…I want you to.
He: Wow, bouncing boobs! Hellooo nurse! Uh, how do you do that?
She: Neat huh? It’s a push-up-pull-down bra. Besides jug jogging, I can do the teeter totter move and I’m learning a 360 degree double whammy.
He: Kewel. So you just rhythmically chew on those rubber bulbs?
She: Right, they inflate and deflate air bladders in the bra where I usually have pads. Hey, don’t touch! I bought the model with hooter honkers, two different tones. Here give me a harmonious hug.
He: Wow, you are one romantic lady, and fine looking, too.
She: Ah thanks, Bumble Bear. Just wait’l next week when I’m also decked out in new cheeky, bounding-buns britches. I’ll be munchin’ mucho.
-- FarmerJohn, Jul 17 2003

Pump-up bra http://www.halfbake.../idea/Pump-up_20bra
similar stuff [FarmerJohn, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Smart Breast http://www.halfbake...idea/Smart_20Breast
also inflatable [FarmerJohn, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Elaine Vassal's Face Bra http://www.tvacres....thing_underwear.htm
... and other inventions from "Ally McBeal". First paragraph. (This show also featured remote control pump heels and a remote flush toilet.) [waugsqueke, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

What?? Bouncing boobs don't come standard on newer models?
-- vendetta, Jul 17 2003


Not when standing still.
-- FarmerJohn, Jul 17 2003


All the jiggle with only half the wiggle. You need a pressure relief valve so that accidental over-inflation won't knock someones eye out. After all, anything more than a mouthful is a waste.
-- LabRat, Jul 17 2003


If you fill it with a vacuum, will you float away?
-- FloridaManatee, Jul 18 2003


I'm not sure I believe the part where he has to be invited to "Look down lower."
-- beauxeault, Jul 18 2003


[FarmerJohn], do you work for IKEA?
-- k_sra, Jul 18 2003


Love the hooter honkers...
-- RayfordSteele, Jul 18 2003


I think it would be more discreet if you put the pump bra between the legs instead. And it would give an added, um, kick to the jiggling.
-- DrCurry, Jul 18 2003


[k_sra] No, SAS.
-- FarmerJohn, Jul 18 2003


[Picturing FJ's prototype popping due to low cabin pressure.]
-- DrCurry, Jul 18 2003


<remembers once-only-for-a-dare-when-very-drunk visit to Club Extreme in Stockholm, whimpers, pulls paper bag over head>
-- 8th of 7, Jul 18 2003


<Inscrutable Oriental Master> "You have much to learn, Grashopper ....." </Inscrutable Oriental Master>

This is the HalfBakery. Suspension of disbelief is mandatory.
-- 8th of 7, Jul 18 2003


//[k_sra] No, SAS.//

SAS - The Power to Know?
Scandinavian Airline System?
Society for Applied Spectroscopy?
Surfers Against Sewage?
-- k_sra, Jul 18 2003


Elaine, the secretary character on "Ally McBeal" had an invention very similar to this called the "Vi-Bra". She would have been an interesting halfbaker, actually (link).
-- waugsqueke, Jul 18 2003


[k_sra] The System ("marry me, fly free").
-- FarmerJohn, Jul 18 2003


Scandinavian Airlines
-- bristolz, Jul 18 2003


Could you put the air bladders on the feet leaving her mouth free for, say, something like...looking normal? Neato bra there.
-- sartep, Jul 20 2003


//("marry me, fly free")//

I thought you were married!

(That's very honest of you, [shift].)
-- k_sra, Aug 05 2003


Yes, for 24 years, but my imaginary alter ego, the lonesome tiller of the earth and thrill-seeking steward of beef and boilers, took control of my fingers.
-- FarmerJohn, Aug 05 2003


Attractive dribble? That's inventive.
-- peterpeter, Aug 05 2003


Model for blondes would have shoulder pad-mounted inflator bulbs actuated by side-to-side head motion necessary when speaking.
-- wombat, Aug 05 2003


Didn't I see this on Are You Being Served?

Not to worry, they'll ride up with wear.
-- darksasami, Nov 18 2003



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