Hides dings in the car paintwork from your spouse.

Obscures the month on your tax disc when it expired yesterday and you suddenly need to drive.

Conceals cigarette burns in the patio furniture from your parents after the party got out of hand.
-- wagster, Jun 03 2009

Another take on the issue Bike_20Beauty_20Bugs
[normzone, Jun 03 2009]

... gives people a place to look at other than the egg-stain on your shirtfront
-- loonquawl, Jun 03 2009


Excellent! May I suggest Guanouflage as a brand name?
-- xenzag, Jun 03 2009


Genius. There is a practical issue of verisimilitude, the white wee wee part and the black true poo part being each on their own insufficient for the disguise to work ("Why is there Tippex all over the car?"). Perhaps this can be remedied by either an Araldite like twin-syringe applicator, or something akin to the Aquafresh toothpaste nozzle. If the latter, be careful not to store the Bird Poo Dispenser in your bathroom.
-- calum, Jun 03 2009


...and if the former, be careful when you need to stick things together.
-- coprocephalous, Jun 03 2009


covers up a list...
-- po, Jun 03 2009


Heh.

Pffffft!

No list here...
-- wagster, Jun 03 2009


hehe, just great! can cover up real bird poo, too + ( I don't why, it's just really early in the morning right now and I couldn't see the list...)
-- xandram, Jun 03 2009


wonderful...[+]. May I suggest Cloaca (pronounced Cloak-a) as a brand name.
-- 4whom, Jun 03 2009


Real cert Dragons' Den sure-fire winner.
-- coprocephalous, Jun 03 2009


Nice one Wags. [+]
-- theleopard, Jun 03 2009


Clever - it would also protect your car from real birdpoo.
-- hippo, Jun 03 2009


Perhaps the word "Aerosol" is misleading. What's needed is a pellet that when propelled sharply towards its intended target, upon impact it has a white "splat" liquid that projects out and a core of dark brown quickly- drying crust.
-- theleopard, Jun 03 2009


I think the word "Arsehole" is perfect, although, technically it is a cloaca.
-- 4whom, Jun 03 2009


// How would this look any different than white spray paint?// In the same way that horse shit doesn't look like playdough...
-- 4whom, Jun 03 2009


//Wouldn't a pocket-size bottle of Liquid Paper or White-Out do the same thing//
Psst, [21Q], [calum] already covered that one, up there ^^^^.

//What's needed is a pellet that when propelled sharply //

Gentlemen, I give you ... Paintball Bird-poo.
-- coprocephalous, Jun 03 2009


That's the ticket.
-- theleopard, Jun 03 2009


I, for one, have problems with the paintball solution. There cannot be anything simpler than the proposed mechanism. Which, I would presume, is similar to a pressurised toothpaste tube.

This pressure can be regulated, and further, regulated to the amount of substance in the tube.

Paintballs, on the other hand, require a lot more calculation, just of the viscosity and acceleration. Not to mention the application (a la sniper) of this solution.

I'll take an "Arsehole" of "Cloaca", anyday.
-- 4whom, Jun 03 2009


I spent a few hours deliberating over whether this would be delivered best by an aerosol or a manual spray gun.

Actually I spent about ten seconds. Life's too short.
-- wagster, Jun 03 2009


I think the *pigeon* poop type would come in handy. It seems to me it has a grayish streak running through it at times. You could use that to blend in stray gray hairs on your head in a pinch.
-- blissmiss, Jun 03 2009



random, halfbakery