As a relatively new owner of a relatively new beard, I often wonder how best to maintain its cleanliness. I have had hit-or-miss results with various types of shampoo, both beard-specific and otherwise, but have had very little luck in finding something that doesn't make the world smell either flowery or like babies.

Luckily, I fried up some slices of bacon for breakfast the other day, and some got caught - of course - in my mustache. I spent the entire day in a haze of bacony goodness, and I'm fairly certain that the odor was faint enough that I was the only one (if not, consider this an open offer to be inspired). It was heavenly.

I do not wish to keep secrets from the world. Join in my joy. Grow a hair or two, and keep it clean. Joyously and porkulously clean.
-- shapu, Sep 16 2013

Manly air freshener Manly_20air_20freshener
Air fresheners with smells that men like [8th of 7, Sep 16 2013]

Trichotillomania https://en.wikipedi...ki/Trichotillomania
[Voice, Sep 17 2013]

I have a beard that is relatively shallow (more than just stubble, but nothing like the normal depth of hair on top of my head). I just use ordinary bath soap to clean it, like I use the same soap on rest of my skin. The rationale is, hair in the underarms doesn't prevent soap from cleaning the skin, so why should hair on the chin prevent soap from cleaning that skin?

Head hair, though, with its very high follicle density and greater length, needs shampoo (nothing fancy). I would be willing to use shampoo on my beard, if it was long enough. But I never let it grow that long.
-- Vernon, Sep 16 2013


[21]: Well spotted.
-- shapu, Sep 16 2013


[+] ...as long as kissing isn't fattening! ;)
-- xandram, Sep 16 2013


If just reading about bacon has me making a BLT Sandwich, smelling it all day would make me a crazed and slobbering fat man.

You could use a cartoon of the result as a trademark.

Homer
-- popbottle, Sep 17 2013


one forseeable problem is your olfactory ability to detect nearby bacon will be hampered by the constant bacon smell.
-- rcarty, Sep 17 2013


I just use shampoo to cleanse the whole lot.
Stubble is stubble is stubble, and flowery smelling babies ain't the worst thing to smell like, am I right?...

...

What?...
Have I shared too much again?
Damnit!
I wasn't the only one thinking it...

I know I wasn't...
-- 2 fries shy of a happy meal, Sep 17 2013


No, you're right about the flowery smelling babies. I like to wash my beard and pop in a copy of Wizard of Oz and watch the arrival to munchkin land until they all start saying follow the yellow brick road. Really puts you right in the scene smelling those flowery babies.
-- rcarty, Sep 17 2013


It's very close to being a flavour....
-- xenzag, Sep 17 2013


[+] beard & bacon
-- FlyingToaster, Sep 17 2013



random, halfbakery