Imagine, if you will, an internet-based service company that allows you to connect with a virtual referee during bouts of verbal conflict. Whether it be strictly an online confrontation or a face-to-face interaction, this fee-based service would provide you with full access (via teleconference or simple 3-way messaging) to an individual who is well versed in the dynamics of logical debate.

This referee would blow the whistle when certain infractions are spotted and impose penaltys accordingly.

TWEET! "Ad Hominem, Jill, 30 seconds Remedial Penalty Box!"

When called into the remedial penalty box, the offending party would be forced to endure a tedious explanation of why the statement is unacceptable as an argument. Their opponent can use this time as they see fit - Planning the next phase of their argument, picking their nose, or dancing around singing "I am so smart! I am so great!"

Declared winners and losers would be an optional service available at extra charge.

(with thanks to [Soterios])
-- justaguy, May 18 2005

The Forest of Rhetoric http://humanities.b.../rhetoric/silva.htm
[DrBob, May 18 2005]

'Straight and Crooked Thinking' by R H Thouless http://www.amazon.c...026-6549778-6400453
Know your enemy! [DrBob, May 18 2005]

Argument fallacies http://www.nobeliefs.com/fallacies.htm
argumentum ad verecundiam [Ling, Jun 07 2005]

Queensbur-E Rules Queensbur-E_20Rules
similar idea [Acme, Jun 07 2005]

On Saturday Night Live they did refereed argument matches in the boxing ring.
-- normzone, May 18 2005


There's always room for an argument.
-- justaguy, May 18 2005


I wasn't aware that arguments followed any particular set of rules.
-- hidden truths, May 18 2005


Yes, and beer almost always results in arguments.
-- justaguy, May 18 2005


"Now, Jill, picking up a chair is not going to prove anythtzzzzz........."
-- egbert, May 18 2005


//I wasn't aware that arguments followed any particular set of rules.//

Oh but they do, hidden truths, they do. (linkies)

The Python sketch referred to by ack also covers this ground.

"I've told you once!"
-- DrBob, May 18 2005


[DrBob] Thanks for the links! I knew that someone would eventually pick up my slack.
-- justaguy, May 18 2005


Argument referees. Would you like us to settle an argument or would you like a blowjob?
-- zeno, May 19 2005


Yeah, you would say that!
-- egbert, May 19 2005


I would've expected more from UnaBubba.
-- justaguy, May 19 2005


What would be the rules?

I could imagine something like:
No repetition
No resorting to personal abuse
No changing the subject
No crying
No repetition

-- Ling, May 20 2005


If you are a man, there is the easy way out:

1) Admit you are an idiot
2) Admit that you are wrong. Being right means you lose.
3) Grovel and beg for forgiveness
4) Keep your mouth shut and don't say anything while she continues to berate you for 5 more hours about how loathsome and insensitive you are after completing step 1 through 3

After being married for a total of 25 years, this method has served me well.
-- Klaatu, May 20 2005


Oooh, without crying and changing the subject I'd be laid bare.
-- bristolz, May 20 2005


No, you wouldn't.
-- Jinbish, Jun 07 2005



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