Product: Coffin
Arcade Coffin   (+13, -1)  [vote for, against]
Styx two fingers up at the boatman

When you're lying dead in your coffin, the ancient tradition is to have two coins placed on your eyes – payment for the boatman on the river Styx to ferry you across to the afterlife.

However, as children of the 80s, many of us have been unwittingly imbued with the concept of reincarnation – an existential off-shoot from the "Unlimited Lives" cheats you used to use on your console games – and we may not wish to input our three-letter name just yet. Some of us would appreciate another go.

So, this modern alternative is to have a screen on the inside of your coffin with a big flashing graphic that repeatedly alternates between "GAME OVER" and "TRY AGAIN - insert coins now".

Glaring in the middle of the screen, a clock counts down from infinity, all set above a small coin slot with a bright red, rectangular, flashing button. This way you can either use your eye's socket-change for a boat ride or you can punt it for another crack at life.

Using the same coffin each time would be nice, allowing you to save your high-scores.
-- theleopard, Jun 03 2009

Ideal way to go. Theme_20park_20cemetery
[coprocephalous, Jun 03 2009]

"Rise from your grave!" http://www.youtube....watch?v=g5_OEO0-NF4
From the arcade game "Altered Beast". Seems somewhat appropriate. [Jinbish, Jun 03 2009]

"Warrior, your life force is running out!" http://www.youtube....ure=related#t=5m28s
From "Gauntlet".
You could put more money in and boost your current life force (prolonging the game) [Jinbish, Jun 03 2009]

Prototype http://www.polr.co....coffin-computer.jpg
More a goth-nerd's wet dream than an ancient Greek funerary custom, revamped for the 21st century, but it's a picture though, right? [theleopard, Jun 05 2009]

That *dead*, dumb and blind kid, sure plays a mean pinball... http://www.gameroom...from_the_crypt.html
[4whom, Jun 05 2009]

The Arcade Coffin is the opposite of a kill screen http://blastmagazin...rld-record-attempt/
Both achievable. [theleopard, Jun 05 2009]

Excellent [+] - the counting-down numbers hold out a hope of redemption and resurrection. This should appeal to Buddhists.
-- hippo, Jun 03 2009


Thanks [hippo] - that's just given me an idea for a Bhuddist prayer-wheel one-armed bandit...
-- coprocephalous, Jun 03 2009


Does anyone know what the rate of inflation has been for river rides on the Styx?
-- Aristotle, Jun 03 2009


(An interesting question, and one which Wiki - the source of all unquestionable knowledge - can surmise an answer)

"It is generally considered very hard or even meaningless to come up with comparative exchange rates with modern currency due to the fact that the range of products produced by economies of centuries gone by were very different from today, which makes Purchasing power parity (PPP) calculations very difficult.

"However, some historians and economists have estimated that in the 5th century BC a drachma had a rough value of 25 U.S. dollars (in the year 1990 - equivalent to 38 USD in 2006)."

The rate on the boat was one obolus, about one sixth of a drachma. So, about $6.30 (£3.80).
-- theleopard, Jun 03 2009


//£3.80// About the same price as a pint of Stella.
-- zen_tom, Jun 03 2009


In our modern age, the Styx Ferry should accept Oyster cards (London-centric travel payment smartcard). It would be a nice gesture for the mourners to each swipe their Oyster cards over the coffin to see the deceased on their way.
-- hippo, Jun 03 2009


TFL haven't even been able to agree an extension of the Oyster Card system to the over-ground stations yet! I doubt they'll be anywhere near completing an agreement to sign up a transport system in a mythical spectral realm outside the dimension of time, let alone outside Zone 2!
-- theleopard, Jun 03 2009


You do realize that a display "counting down from infinity" is impossible, right? I mean how do you display infinity -1 ? If you show it as infinity, then it's not counting down, and if you show 9999...999 then it's not infinity.

Hmm... actually, you could display it as "infinity - n" where n is the number of seconds it's been on. Doesn't have the same authenticity, though.
-- ckiick, Jun 03 2009


If the boatmen are accepting all denominations of all currencies, I would bet there is an oppurtunity for arbitrage. Possibly extending into a "free game".
-- 4whom, Jun 03 2009


//display "counting down from infinity" is impossible//

(Yup, thought it was funny)
-- theleopard, Jun 03 2009


The clock need not be digital. It could be an analogue dial with one hand stuck forever at the top and the other sweeping round counterclockwise.
-- nineteenthly, Jun 03 2009


Funny, but not impossible. Of course you could never actually count down, but it could give a reasonable approximation to counting down. It is just that your most significant digit would never go away. You could count down from infinity in just two decimal place holders, if you want.

Ooops sorry [nine...] you just said that.
-- 4whom, Jun 03 2009


'Sorright.
-- nineteenthly, Jun 03 2009


Just seen your link [jinbish] (couldn't play at work). Most appropriate. I presume that's the game you'd have in yours?
-- theleopard, Jun 03 2009


Nah. 'Altered Beast' is a classic, but there are so many others from a mis-spent youth to choose from. 'Gauntlet' is a contender, for its seemingly never-ending nature.
-- Jinbish, Jun 03 2009


***pish*** (nerds...) I just want to go on record as having voted +
-- dentworth, Jun 05 2009


donkey kong. If nirvana is achievable then so is a original DK kill screen.
-- WcW, Jun 05 2009


//What, you mean Barnes?// You're right about Barnes. It's hair-raising evidence of the non-euclidean geometry of London. Maps show it clearly as an inner suburb, yet letters take longer to be delivered there than to the Scottish Islands, the cars in residents' parking spots show 'Countryside Alliance' stickers, and morning commuters flock southwards to the main-line train station, although they could actually arrive at work sooner by taking a bus into Hammersmith. I lived there for a month. It crept me out.
-- pertinax, Jun 09 2009


If they *were* to connect up Barnes with the Underworld via the tube, would they call it the Spectral line?
-- theleopard, Jun 09 2009



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